Three Little Words
by iwannagibbs
Summary: Gibbs and M. Allison Hart are in a relationship but then there's Ziva. What to do? Not everyone's favorite person but let's give Ms. Hart a chance.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I know many of us, myself included, didn't like M. Allison Hart when she was on the show. I think we have to admit though that there was a spark there between her and Gibbs and they most definitely got together for a while. I decided to branch out a bit in this story and see what happened. It has taken me a while to get to a finish point. It was intended to be a much shorter story but sort of took on a life of its own as so many of my stories seem to do. Hope you like.

**Three Little Words**

Anyone looking in the window at the couple relaxing in the living room of the house in Arlington, Virginia would believe they were seeing two persons at ease with each other and enjoying a quiet evening at home. They would be mistaken.

There were certainly two people sitting together on a comfortable sofa but for very different reasons they were definitely not at ease. Not on this night. The man was sitting at one end of the sofa with his feet on the coffee table. The woman was lying with her head in his lap. He was watching an old movie and she was reading from a Kindle. His right arm rested on the arm of the sofa and his left arm lay across her stomach.

The movie was not holding the man's interest so he let his head fall back on the couch and closed his eyes. His right hand came up to play with the lady's hair. His body was relaxed but his mind was going a hundred miles an hour. The woman whose head rested comfortably in his lap had been out of town on business lately and this was the first evening they had been together in several weeks. He had missed her and was glad she was back. That troubled him some because while she was gone he had realized their time together was coming to an end.

For years Jethro Gibbs had been able to control his personal life by not getting too close to anyone and not allowing anyone to get close to him. He did so out of a deep need to protect himself and because he had failed so many times when it came to protecting the people he loved. From his mother to his first wife and their child right on through Kate and Jenny and Mike Franks, he had let people down. He avoided intimate relationships as much for himself as for the other person. Jethro was tired of seeing people he cared about get hurt. Unfortunately the woman currently on his sofa had not been willing to be put off. She pushed and insisted and cajoled until finally they began a relationship that, while rocky at the beginning, had smoothed out and gone pretty well for several months.

That was about to come to an end though. While the lady was out of town Jethro had made a startling discovery. Feelings he had kept buried for years accidentally came to light very late one night and the knowledge they were reciprocated had turned his life and future upside down. For days afterwards Jethro brooded and worried and tried to make it go away. But "it" wouldn't go away and he finally admitted he didn't want this to go away. Potential problems were too numerous to mention where this was concerned but the most pressing problem was the woman with her head in his lap. He cared about Allison Hart but he wasn't in love with her. He had been happy since they got together but most of the time he was just waiting for the other shoe to drop; for her to move on just like all the others had done.

He had agonized over his decision night after night but by the time she came back he was sure of what he was going to do. Seeing her this afternoon when she arrived at his house from the airport he almost changed his mind. He had known he missed her but when he opened the front door and found her exiting the cab he was struck by how _much_ he had missed her and how much he really liked having her in his life. His confusion must have been evident on his face because she asked him if he was alright. And when she wrapped herself around him he allowed himself to give in and welcome her home in the manner she wanted and expected. Afterward, in the shower while she slept, Jethro cursed himself and swore he would end this crazy situation tonight.

As the hot water ran over his body, Jethro let his mind wander back to "that night" as he had taken to referring to it. It had actually been very early in the morning, maybe two or three o'clock when he'd heard her coming down the stairs into his basement. The case they had closed that night had been particularly grueling and when the team left after ten o'clock he had told them to take the next morning off. He was not quite drunk but he had a good buzz on so when Ziva David descended into his sanctuary his defenses were not at their best. For years Jethro had felt they had a special connection but he repeatedly and mostly successfully ignored his feelings for his beautiful, young agent. For whatever reason, tonight would bring all that to an end.

"_Ziva. Whatcha doin here? It's the middle of the night."_

"_I could not get to sleep. I wanted to talk to you."_

_Ziva David looked at him and he looked back but neither of them moved or said anything for a long few moments. Jethro had been sanding his boat and he went back to it as Ziva approached. He wondered what was going on; she rarely came to him and certainly not in the middle of the night. He tried to concentrate on the boat but it was not easy to do with her standing so close and him having just that much too much bourbon in his system. He hadn't slept in a couple of nights due to the case and if this went on too long he was wary of what might happen or be said or both._

_Finally he put down the sanding block and backed up to lean against his workbench. He told himself he could handle this and tried to think about Allison. After all he was in a relationship and he was happy and he couldn't act on his feelings for Ziva anyway. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her and found her fidgeting with her keys and acting very out of character. _

"_Ziva is something wrong?"_

"_No. Yes. I'm not sure. Are you still seeing Ms. Hart?" Ziva stumbled and tripped over her own words and when she finally asked the question she couldn't look at him._

"_Yes."_

"_Oh." She hoped she had stifled her disappointment but she wasn't sure._

"_You came over here in the middle of night to ask me about my personal life?"_

_Ziva took a deep breath and looked him straight in the eyes. She gathered her considerable inner strength and began what she knew would be a difficult conversation._

"_I came to ask you if you are happy."_

_Definitely not what he was expecting but he did her the courtesy of holding her gaze._

"_Why?"_

"_Please, Gibbs, just answer the question."_

"_Yes, I guess so. Mostly." His hesitancy was evident in his mumbled reply._

"_So partly not?"_

"_Ziver just get to it. Why are you really here?"_

"_Petty Officer Carver. She told me that she wished she had told our victim how she felt about him. She said she had known for a long time she was in love with him but she did not tell him and now she will never have the chance."_

_Ziva stopped and looked at Gibbs. He was so focused on her voice and what she was saying he didn't notice she had stepped closer to him. Finally he realized she had stopped talking and was looking at him as if he was to reply. He didn't know what to say so he kept quiet; at technique that normally served him well. In this case it frustrated his guest to no end._

"_Do you understand what I said, Gibbs?"_

"_Yeah, Carver was in love with Petty Officer Banks and she never told him. Pretty sure we figured that out already."_

_Ziva clenched her fists and her teeth and literally stomped her foot in frustration. Gibbs just looked at her and smirked. He was pretty damned sure what she was trying to say but he certainly was not going to help her. If she was going to tell him she was in love with DiNozzo she was going to have to spit it out all on her own; he wasn't going to help her break his heart._

"_You…you….you are the most obstinate and frustrating man I have ever known! I am here because I do not want to find myself in Carver's position one day. I care about you Gibbs. More than as just a coworker. I have very strong feelings for you and I have had for a very long time."_

_Right up until the moment he heard his name from her beautiful lips he was convinced he was about to be a very unhappy man. When he heard her say his name he pretty much blanked out on the rest of it. All he could do was stare at her and hope she repeated herself._

"_Gibbs, did you hear what I said?"_

"_Part of it. Could you repeat the part that came after my name 'cos that's when I lost you."_

_Ziva just smiled that fabulous smile of her and stepped up until she was smack dab in front of him. She did not repeat herself. Instead she put her hands on either side of his face, leaned in and kissed him. As soon as Gibbs could comprehend what she was doing, he wrapped her in his arms and let her have her way with him. That kiss went on and on until finally Ziva very reluctantly had to pull away so she could take a breath. She ran her fingers through his hair and laid her forehead against his._

"_Do I still need to repeat myself?"_

_Gibbs was reeling from the kiss and was not entirely sure how to answer her. He very much wanted a repeat of that kiss._

"_Maybe just that last part again."_

_Ziva leaned back in his arms and laughed. The look in his eyes was one she had not seen before. It was gentle and possessive and lustful all at the same time. She liked it._

"_Ziver we need to slow down here. You need to let me catch up to you."_

"_Okay. I am sorry if I shocked you but I have wanted to do that for so long and I could not wait any longer. I suspected you might feel the same but did not know for sure. Am I correct that you have feelings for me?"_

"_Yes you are correct. But…."_

"_No, Gibbs. I do not want to hear that this cannot be. We must at least give ourselves a chance."_

"_Ziver, I'm in a relationship with Allison. You know that. I need time to end that. And, you work for me. That has to be dealt with. It's not going to be simple."_

"_Simple, difficult I do not care but do not say impossible. I will not accept that. I can quit if I have to in order for us to explore these feelings."  
_

"_Nobody's quitting. Just give me a chance to sort things out." _

_As if to emphasize his interest in their new situation, Jethro pulled Ziva into a kiss that quite literally took her breath away. When he let her breathe again he framed her face in his big hands and soothed her swollen lips with his thumb._

"_I never thought in a million years you felt as I do. I have wanted you for so long, Ziver." _

_Jethro felt as if a heavy weight had lifted from his heart as he said those words to her. Tears filled Ziva's eyes and she laid her head on his chest wrapping her arms around him and holding on for dear life. They stayed in that embrace for a long time neither willing to break the spell. _

_Jethro knew Allison would be gone for another week and he began that night to work out how he would tell her their relationship was over. He knew it wouldn't be a pleasant conversation but he still found himself looking forward to having it over and done with so he could move on with his life with Ziva. _

_For her part, Ziva would have been happy to never leave Gibbs' embrace after that night. She had known for years that she loved him but she had no real idea until the year before that maybe he had feelings for her. Then Allison showed up and pretty soon it was obvious to Ziva that Gibbs and the evil Ms. Hart were together. She couldn't figure out what he saw in her but she had to admit he seemed happier since he'd started seeing the attorney they all hated. Ziva had been hoping and indeed even praying that something would happen to cause the, in her opinion, mismatched couple to split. Now apparently, something had happened. She had happened. Ziva smiled into Jethro's chest and gave herself a silent congratulations. _

_Eventually Jethro let Ziva go and she stepped back just enough that she could look him in the eyes again. She marveled at how quickly her life had taken such a dramatic turn. Just an hour ago she was brooding about Jethro and now she was in his arms and looking forward to exploring a future with him._

"_Ziver we need to be careful for the next few weeks. I need to settle things with Allison and we need to think through what we're doing."_

"_I can be careful and patient but only for a very short time. I feel a lot of time has been wasted and I do not intend to let much more time go by without being with you."_

"_Are you absolutely sure you want this? I'm old enough to be your father Ziva."_

"_I am sure and I do not care what your age is. That does not matter to me. I know you Gibbs and I know I will never find another man I care for or respect as much as I do you."_

"_I think you could call me Jethro now that we've had our tongues down each other's throats."_

_Ziva laughed and Jethro pulled her to him. He let his fingers get tangled in her delicious brown curls and then he kissed her. It was a slow, sweet kiss that quickly turned into much more. His hands were tugging at her sweater and when his rough fingers found her soft skin they both moaned in satisfaction. Ziva ran her hand under his sweatshirt and scraped her nails up his back. Before things could get completely out of control Jethro broke the kiss and stepped out of Ziva's grasp._

"_Wow. We have to stop, Ziver. If we don't there is gonna be trouble and I won't do that to you or to Allison. Please understand." _

_Ziva gathered herself and shoved her disappointment way down where it wouldn't show on her face. _

"_I do understand. I do not want to but I understand. You are an honorable man, Jethro and I do not want you to do anything that feels wrong to you."_

"_You don't feel wrong to me. I can't explain it but I've never cheated on a woman I was with and I don't want to start now. I want you Ziver, in the worst way but I need to wait."_

"_I know. I should go. When will you…."_

"_Allison will be back on Friday. I'll tell her that night. Until then we just have to be patient and try to keep things normal."_

"_It will be very difficult for me to stay away from you but I will. I do not want to put pressure on you, Jethro. Are you going to tell Allison about me?"_

_Jethro hesitated because he really had no idea how he was going to end things with Allison. He honestly cared for her and did not want to hurt her. _

"_I don't know what I'm gonna say. I'll have to figure that out in the next five days."_

"_I am sorry for complicating you life."_

"_No, don't ever apologize for how you feel. I've never thought Allison and I would be together for the long term. Mostly because I expect her to find someone else better for her. I'll work it out. I never thought I'd have a chance to be with you Ziva and now that I do, I intend to take it."_

"_I hope you know that long term is what I want with you, Jethro. I do not want just a fling, as they say."_

"_Me either. Come here and kiss me and then go home."_

_Ziva kissed him one last time that night and then she left. Jethro sat in the basement too stunned by the night's revelations to get any sleep. The next five days were going to be some of the longest and most trying of his career._

Allison knew Jethro wasn't watching the movie anymore and she wondered why he was so quiet. Of course he was always pretty quiet but she usually heard at least barebones comments even during a movie she knew he'd seen at least five times. Not tonight. Allison was not overly concerned by his silence. He had seemed happy to see her today and he welcomed her home in just the fashion she had hoped for. Jethro was most definitely a man of few words but in their private life his actions spoke volumes and there was no need for him to do a lot of talking. Today had been no exception. She thought he might have been a bit distracted while they were eating but she pushed that thought away. She had other, very important things to worry about at the moment.

Allison had not even the barest hint of what Jethro was thinking about as she lay comfortably in his lap.

Over the year they had been dating, Allison had come to appreciate Jethro more than she had thought possible when they first met. At that time she was determined to help her boss bring Agent Gibbs down and make him pay for what she was told were many misdeeds and outright illegalities in his past. She knew for a fact that Jethro had killed the man he held responsible for the deaths of his first wife and their child. She knew from her extensive research that he had skirted the edges of the law on several occasions to solve cases he was working on and in her rather narrow viewpoint at the time, he needed to pay for that. Now she felt differently. She knew Jethro had done things that strictly according to the law were wrong, but she would gladly defend him any day of the week. He got the job done and he protected his team and the people who were looking to him for answers to very complicated and difficult questions.

Allison had not given much thought to the future and how she and Jethro were going to work in the long run. She hadn't been in a relationship longer than three months until she and Jethro got together so she was in new territory. Knowing his history and track record with wives, Allison was surprised they were still together. She didn't know exactly how to account for their longevity but she suspected her knowing about Shannon and Kelly from the start had something to do with it. Plus, they had faced some pretty hard truths in the very beginning and learned to trust one another under difficult circumstances. She hoped Jethro would remember that after tonight.

Jethro put his feet down and moved to stand up. Thinking Allison was asleep he tried to slide out and let her lie down but she shifted and sat up.

"Sorry. Need to put another log on the fire."

"It's okay. I thought you were asleep you've been so quiet."

"Thought you were."

Jethro didn't look at her. He picked up two small pieces of firewood from the rack and added them to the fire. He poked around, stirring up the embers until the fire was going again. For the longest time he just stared into the fire working up his courage. Finally he turned around and found Allison watching him intently.

"You okay, Jethro? You've hardly said a word since supper."

"Finish your book?"

"Almost. It's down to the nitty gritty so I'll probably finish tonight. You didn't answer my question. Is something wrong?"

Jethro looked down at this feet and then back to the fire. Allison was suddenly nervous. She could almost forget about what she wanted to talk about when she saw the look in his eyes as he finally looked at her. She got up and went to stand in front of him.

"Hey, what's the matter? Talk to me Jethro."

She reached for his hand and laced her fingers with his as she leaned in closer to him. There was a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach and she knew she didn't want to hear what he was going to say.

"I'm just tired. It's been a long week and I didn't get much sleep the last couple of days."

"Are you sure?"

Jethro knew he needed to tell her he wanted to end things between them but he couldn't seem to find the right words. He liked Allison and he hated the idea of hurting her. He thought about Ziva and the kisses they had shared in the basement last weekend. The memory of Ziva's mouth on his and way he felt when she wrapped her arms around him, the taste and scent of her; the memory of all that finally gave him the courage he needed.

"There is something we need to talk about."

Maybe she had waited as long as she possibly could or maybe she had some kind of intuition that said she didn't want to hear what Jethro was about to say. Whatever it was, Allison stopped him.

"I have something I need to talk about too. Can I go first?"

For a split second Jethro wondered if she was going to break up with him and save him from what he needed to do. He was almost glad to put off his end of the discussion for a little while. He figured whatever she needed to talk about couldn't compare with what he was going to do to them.

"Sure. Go ahead."

Allison took a deep breath and reached for Jethro's other hand. The suspense was killing him and he allowed a tiny bit of hope to grow in his mind. Hope that she was through with him and moving on.

"Jethro, I'm pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 2**

Three little words. Three little words and his dreams of a life with Ziva were shattered. Three words and the distant dream he had given up on almost twenty years ago was suddenly real again. Jethro just stood there staring at Allison. He stared at the woman who had simultaneously broken his heart and fixed it with the same three words, 'Jethro I'm pregnant'.

His next thought was of Ziva. What was he going to tell her and what was he going to do? He could not walk away from his child. He could not imagine being a part time parent, seeing his son or daughter only on weekends and every other holiday. There was no way that was going to happen if he could help it. That meant he could not be with Ziva. After years of pushing aside his feelings and ignoring his desires he had been so close to having the woman he truly wanted and now that was not going to happen. Jethro felt sick to his stomach. In an instant, Allison had torn away the happiness he thought he was going to finally have with Ziva.

All of these thoughts went through his mind at a dizzying speed. He had no idea what sort of expression Allison was seeing on his face. He was too shocked by what she'd said to try and control his reaction. Knowing how well she could read him, Jethro was right to be concerned about what his face and his eyes were showing her.

"Jethro, say something. For god's sake you look like you're about to cry. I know this is a shock but it's not the end of the world."

He thought to himself, 'yes, it is the end of my world or at least what I wanted my world to be'.

"How did this happen? I thought you were…."

Jethro extracted his hands from hers and began pacing around the room. His mind was a jumble and he really felt like he needed to get out of the house.

"I was but nothing is foolproof. I'm guessing it happened while we were at the cabin. We spent an awful lot of time in bed that weekend. I certainly didn't plan it if that's what you're suggesting."

Allison was a bit put out by his response and the hint of anger in his voice.

"I'm not suggesting that at all. I'm just surprised is all."

"You look a lot more than surprised. In fact you look angry. Look, don't think I'm trying to trap you into anything. I can handle this on my own if that's what you want. Don't worry about it."

"That's not what I want. Of course you won't handle this on your own. I will be right here with you. Just let me get my head around this alright. Dammit, Allison just give me a minute."

She wasn't mollified by his response. Both of them had raised their voices and she sensed the conversation was about to get out of hand. Jethro's facial expression and body language were telling her something completely different than what his words were telling her. He barely looked at her and was distancing himself from her with every trip around the room. He looked like she'd told him someone had died instead that he was going to be a father. Suddenly, Allison wondered what he had wanted to talk about. She started to ask him but for some reason she didn't. Unknowingly, she was protecting herself from something she really didn't want to know.

"Jethro, come sit down and talk to me. Tell me why you're so upset."

"No. I mean, not right now. Let me go get some air and think for a while. I'll be back."

Now she was well and truly pissed off. Walking out on her was most definitely not what she expected from him.

"Fine. If I'm not here when you come back don't call me. I'll be touch with you."

"Allison, don't leave. Please. I just want to take a little while to sort out how I feel about this. I never expected to be in this position and I need to figure it out. I don't want you to leave. Please."

Wow, two pleases in one statement. Allison was surprised by the emotion as well as the words Jethro used to ask her to stay.

"Alright, I'll be here."

"Thanks. I won't be gone long."

Jethro grabbed his keys and went out the front door. Moments later Allison heard his truck start up and he was gone. She sat down and tried to understand what had just happened. She knew darn well Jethro wasn't going somewhere to think; he did all his thinking in the basement. He never just went for a drive to clear his head. Hell, nobody who lived in Northern Virginia "just went for a drive". The traffic was too atrocious for that. The more she thought about it the less she believed what he'd said and less she wanted to see him again tonight. Contrary to what she'd told him Allison decided it would be best if she wasn't there when Jethro came home. She went upstairs, gathered her still unpacked bags and left the house.

On the drive to Ziva's apartment, Jethro cursed the fates and practically broke his hand slamming it on the steering wheel of his truck. Why did this have to happen now? If he was to be a father again why couldn't it have been Ziva having his child? The knot in his stomach was getting worse the closer he got to Ziva's apartment. He wanted to be angry with Allison but that made no sense and even in his very distressed state he knew this was not her fault. After all, he had certainly always been a willing participant in their sex life. All he could do was keep asking himself why and there was no answer for that. There never had been.

By the time he walked up to Ziva's door, Jethro's emotions were all over the place. For a man who almost always had very tight control of everything in his life that was very troublesome. He tried to get himself under control by taking some deep breaths and reminding himself not to take his frustration out on Ziva. She was the person he had, until about twenty minutes ago, thought he was going to spend the rest of his life with and now he had to tell her he couldn't be with her. He wasn't sure how he was going to survive the next several minutes. Finally, Jethro reminded himself who he was and what he had survived in life to this point and found the courage to knock on Ziva's door.

At first Ziva didn't hear him knocking because she was in the kitchen washing dishes and singing to herself. She knew Allison was due back today and she was anxious to hear from Jethro that he had ended their relationship and was free to be with her. When she finally did hear the rather insistent knocking she dried her hands and went to open the door. She checked through the peep hole and saw Jethro standing in the hallway. He looked…..well she couldn't really figure out how he looked. She opened the door and stood back so he could come in.

"I wasn't expecting you tonight."

She barely got that greeting out before Jethro had his hands on her pushing her against the door she had just closed behind him. He leaned into her, his hands on her upper arms, and kissed her. He was holding her too tightly and pressing against her and kissing her almost violently. Ziva was a strong, athletic woman but she was not able to move at all with Jethro, a much bigger, stronger and heavier person putting his weight and considerable effort into holding her and kissing her. Finally, Ziva managed to turn her face away from his mouth and take a much needed breath.

"Jethro, you are hurting me! Let go of me, please."

Jethro let go of her arms as if he'd been stung and stepped back so she could move. He couldn't look at her. Taking a breath he realized what he'd just done. He reached up to gently caress her lips with his thumb.

"I'm sorry, Zi. I'm sorry."

Ziva had recovered her senses and heard such sadness in his voice it scared her. She took his face in her hands and kissed him softly on the mouth. When they broke apart Jethro rested his forehead on hers.

"Jethro, what's the matter? What's happened?"

Without lifting his head he mumbled, "She's pregnant."

"Oh my god. Oh. My. God." Ziva was obviously at a loss for words.

She wrapped her arms around him and held on tight. She instantly knew their dream was over. All the years she'd wasted came hurtling back to her and she wanted to scream. How could life be so cruel to them?

Jethro raised his head and looked at her with tears in his eyes. Neither of them spoke, they just looked at each other and then Ziva led him to the couch and they sat down. But Jethro couldn't sit still and he got up to pace back and forth in the tiny living room. Ziva too got up and went to the kitchen to make coffee. Jethro followed her. Still they had not spoken. Once the coffee was brewing Ziva stood at the sink staring at the wall. Jethro came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She covered his hands with hers and leaned her head back on his shoulder. He kissed her neck and let himself inhale her scent for a moment.

Ziva's mind was racing but her immediate concern was Jethro's mental state. She had never seen him so emotional. She couldn't remember ever seeing him near tears except under the most extreme circumstances such as the death of Mike Franks. She steeled herself to talk to him and told herself she would deal with her own emotions later. She loved Jethro and now she had to send him home to another woman and their child.

The coffee was finished and Ziva moved to extricate herself from Jethro's embrace.

"Sit down while I pour. We have to talk."

Jethro sat down at the small kitchen table and after pouring them each a cup of coffee, Ziva sat across from him. She reached one hand across the table and Jethro grasped it as if it were a lifeline. She rubbed her thumb on his knuckles.

"I didn't mean to hurt you Ziver."

She wasn't sure exactly what he was referring to; the kiss at the door or the news of Allison's pregnancy, but it didn't matter, her reply would be the same regardless.

"I know Jethro. You would never hurt me on purpose, I know that. Tell me what has happened. Well, no I guess you already did that. Tell me how you are feeling about it."

Jethro was studying the tabletop. He couldn't bring himself to look Ziva in the eyes.

"Angry, sad, shocked. I don't really know. I guess all of the above and a lot more I can't identify right now."

"What did you say when she told you?"

"I don't even remember. I didn't handle it well I know that. I told her I needed some time to think and I left."

"Oh dear. I doubt that went over very well."

"Not really."

Jethro looked up and found Ziva looking at him with a mixture of love and resignation. He felt like crying and throwing up at the same time.

"I don't know what to do Ziver."

His voice was thick with anguish and it tore at her heart.

Hers was equally shaky when she replied, "Yes you do Jethro."

She was right of course. He knew exactly what he had to do and that was why he was so miserable. He looked at Ziva and wondered how the hell he was going to keep working with her after this debacle. How could he look at her every day knowing what could have been?

"Jethro, believe me I know how you are feeling right now but we have to accept this situation for what it is. You and I were not meant to be. That is the hard truth. You have a child on the way and I know you will not turn your back on that child or its mother."

"Maybe…."

"No, there can be no maybes or what ifs. You must make a family with Ms. Hart and your child. I cannot be part of you not doing what you know in you soul you must do."

"How can you be so calm about this? I can barely think straight Ziver."

"Believe me I am not calm inside. My heart is broken Jethro. I love you and I wanted us to be together but it just cannot be. Do not think for a moment I am not crushed and struggling to take the next breath because I am. Would it help you if I had some sort of tantrum or broke down and cried?"

"Probably not but if that's what you need to do I want you to do it with me. I don't want to leave you here and picture you crying all by yourself.

Jethro got up and pulled Ziva into his arms. She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest. Before long he felt her tears soaking his shirt. He refused to let his own tears fall but it took everything he had to accomplish that. He stroked her hair, smoothing it down her back as she cried. He tried not to think about all that he was not going to have with this beautiful, passionate young woman. Truth be told he wanted to take her and disappear somewhere they could never be found.

Ziva hated to cry and certainly wasn't pleased with crying into Jethro's chest but she couldn't help herself. All she could think about was all the time she had wasted and how she was too late to have the man she was in love with. She refused to imagine Jethro with Ms. Hart and their child. She was not callous enough to wish anything bad to happen and in fact, she was at least partially happy for Jethro to have another child on the way. She knew how much he missed Kelly and hoped this child would eventually be a happy gift for him. Ziva wondered how she was going to manage working with Jethro going forward. At this moment in time she did not think it would be possible.

Finally, Ziva loosened her hold on Jethro and went to the sink to splash some cold water on her face. She dried her eyes and turned to look at him still standing like a lost little boy in her kitchen.

Ziva reached up and stroked his cheek with her fingertips.

"It will be alright, Jethro. We will both be alright. You must accept this child and love him or her and take care of Allison. You must be happy. Please, promise me you will be happy."

"I can't promise you that Ziver. I can't."

"Jethro, if I had not come to you last week you would be at home right now probably celebrating the new life you have helped create. Please do not let that brief moment in time destroy what you can have in the future. Do you see how that would hurt me? It would make me feel so responsible for your pain. I do not think I can stand it if my telling you I love you caused you pain."

"That's not it. I hurt because I can't have you. We can't be together. After all this time to find you love me and now to not be able to be with you is killing me, Ziver. I don't for a second blame you for anything."

"But you cannot blame Allison either. You have to admit you have been happy with her these past few months. Am I right?"

"Yes, you're right. But not like I was the night you came to see me."

"Jethro, we have to put that night and those feelings behind us just as we put that other night in your basement behind us. One was horrific and the other was wonderful but in the same way we must put them away and go forward."

"I don't want to forget what happened last week."

"If you do not it will poison your relationship with Allison and do you no good. I will always love you Jethro and I know you will always love me but we have to allow ourselves to let that go and love someone else."

"I'm sick to death of letting go of people I love!"

Jethro stormed out of the kitchen and paced around and around in the living room. Ziva gathered herself and went after him. She stood at the end of the couch for a moment watching him. Finally she stopped him with a hand to his chest and pushed him to the couch to sit down. She sat on the low table in front of him and held his hands. She waited for him to look at her then she launched her assault. Her voice was calm and low and Jethro recognized it as her "I mean business" voice.

"So what is the alternative? You go home and tell Allison you are in love with me and we are going to be together. She picks up and leaves. She goes to all her doctor appointments alone and manages through all the morning sickness and stress of the pregnancy by herself. She has girlfriend be her labor coach and they go to all the prenatal classes together. She shows the friend the sonogram pictures. She calls the friend when she goes into labor and that friend is there when your child is born. Allison sends you a birth announcement like she does all her friends or maybe she leaves you off the list. Perhaps you only know about the baby because her attorney contacts you about child support. If Allison is feeling kindly toward you, which is doubtful, she allows you to visit the child occasionally. Or maybe, she moves to another state and you never see her or your child again. I guess you could fight all that if you chose to and I imagine you would. What would that do to our relationship? Do you think on top of all the challenges we were already facing we could manage to deal with an angry Allison Hart?"

"I don't think she'd do all that. She wouldn't take my child away from me."

"My god Jethro of course she could! She would be devastated. I know I surely would make you suffer if you did that to me. Allison may very well not even be there when you go home tonight. Maybe she would not do all those things but you cannot tell me you would be happy being a part time father. I know you better than that, Jethro. And, I do not want that for you."

"Why does it have to be so hard?"

"Because it is life and life is sometimes very difficult. You of all people know that."

"I guess."

"You know."

They sat there on the couch, two miserable people in love with each other but not destined to be together. Jethro knew he needed to go home but he couldn't make himself let go of Ziva's hands. He couldn't move off her couch. Ziva knew she should send him on his way but she hated the thought of watching him walk out her door toward a life with another woman. She could not bear the thought of walking into work on Monday and seeing him there. She wanted to move and sit next to him and be held just one more time but Ziva doubted her ability to gracefully let him leave if she did that. After what seemed an eternity she raised his hands to her mouth and kissed each one softly. She had an epiphany in that moment and looked at him with love.

"Jethro, I think you must go home. And so must I."

"No, Ziver. I don't want you to leave."

"Just listen. My father is not well and has been asking me to come see him. I think now is the time to do that. I do not think he has much time left and I need to resolve all that is between us. I was going to talk to you about this anyway and now is the perfect time."

"Will you come back?"

"I cannot say right now. I must see how things are there first. I do not want to leave you forever but I need to do this and you need to do what you must do."

Ziva leaned in and took Jethro's face in her hands. Oh how she loved to lose herself in those beautiful blue eyes. She ran her fingers over his face and studied him with every intention of memorizing each and every one of his handsome features.

"I love you Jethro. You are the best man I have ever known. Thank you for all you have done for me. Thank you for loving me."

Jethro buried his fingers in her hair and pulled her against his chest and kissed her. He knew he shouldn't but he absolutely could not stop himself. He kissed her slow and soft and then when she wrapped her arms around his neck he deepened the kiss and pulled her onto the couch with him. He wanted to be able to remember the taste and feel of Ziva for a very long time. Jethro knew that all she had said to him was true and he knew he had to go home to Allison but dammit he wanted one last kiss from the woman he loved.

When they had to breathe, Jethro pulled away just enough to allow Ziva to take a breath. He kissed her over and over again, soft clingy kisses all over her face. He framed her face with his big hands and looked deep into her soul.

"I want you to come back Ziver. I will do what I must but I want you to come back if you can. I love you and I wish to God this hadn't happened. I should be thanking you for loving me not the other way around. I love you."

Ziva rested her hands on his wrists as he continued to hold her face in his hands. She blinked away her tears.

"You must promise me you will be happy, Jethro. Promise me you will love and enjoy your child. Do not blame Allison for who she is or is not. Let yourself love her if you can. Promise me."

Jethro blinked back his own tears and kissed her on the forehead.

"I promise I'll try. I will love my child I can promise that at least. I will be a good father."

"I know you will do that. Remember, part of being a good father is treating your child's mother well. She must be a good person or you would not have been with her this long. And she loves you Jethro. Accept that and things will go easier."

"How do you know she loves me?"

"How can she not?"

Jethro kissed her one last time then he stood up to leave. Ziva walked with him to the door and before he left she hugged him one last time.

"I will call the Director tomorrow and let him know I need to go to Israel. Hopefully, he will not be angry at the short notice."

"I'll talk to him. You should call the team before you go. Maybe get together with them for lunch or something."

"I will do that. I will call them."

Neither of them wanted to say goodbye so they didn't. They embraced again and then Jethro kissed her softly.

"Promise me you'll be happy too, Ziver."

"I will try, Jethro. I will try as hard as you do."

Jethro reached up to touch her face then turned and walked away. Ziva closed the door and sank to the floor her back to the door. She covered her face in her hands and cried and cried.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: ** Thank you for all the alerts and the reviews. I appreciate each one of them. This is a short chapter so I thought I'd get it out there tonight.

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 3**

Jethro sat in his truck for a long time before starting it up and heading home. He wondered if Allison would be there. He knew she had every right to be upset with him and he was ready to make amends if he could. If she asked where he had been, Jethro knew he'd have to tell her; he wouldn't lie to her so he hoped she didn't ask. When he pulled in his driveway the house was dark and Allison's car was gone. He backed out and drove to her apartment.

On the twenty minute drive to Allison's apartment, Jethro replayed all that Ziva had told him. He had to acknowledge she was right about everything, as usual. He had to admit she was right about Allison; she is a good person and he has been happy with her. When they first met he could hardly stand her but there was something about the way she looked at him that intrigued him. The fact she was working for such scum as Col. Bell had definitely set Jethro against her but of course she didn't work for Col. Bell anymore. Ever since that fiasco ended Allison had been working almost exclusively to help women and children who were victims of domestic violence or child abuse. She had transferred the considerable passion she had originally directed at destroying him to her new clients and Jethro was very proud of the work she did. And, very glad she was now on his side. At least she had been until about two hours ago.

Looking at his watch, Jethro realized it was almost midnight. He had been with Ziva longer than he thought but certainly not long enough. How he would manage the next several months was a mystery to him but he knew he would have to suck it up and ignore the ache in his gut if he was going to keep his promises to her. Jethro had learned a long time ago that when you love someone that person has a power over you that is immeasurable. Ziva had the power to elicit a promise from him to let her go and be happy with someone else. He wanted to live up her expectations of him so he would try to make a good life with Allison. He would pray every day that Ziva would be happy and find someone to love her.

Arriving at Allison's apartment complex a short time later, Jethro wondered if she would let him in or send him home. He wouldn't blame her if she shut the door in his face but he hoped she would at least give him a chance to talk to her. He took the stairs to the second floor and pushed the doorbell.

Allison had been home long enough to unpack her suitcase and start her laundry. She purposely kept herself busy with mundane tasks so she wouldn't spend all her time wondering where Jethro was and who he was with. She knew he had gone to talk to someone; probably either Ducky or Ziva. Jethro had few friends and Allison knew his team was his family. She doubted he would confide their situation to any of them except Ducky or Ziva. Of course she had no issue with him taking to Ducky but the idea of him going to Ziva was a different matter. She knew they had a special bond and a long history and she had often wondered if there was more to their relationship than just work. She couldn't blame them if there was. After all they were very much alike in terms of attitude, both attractive people and they worked together in a very stressful job. No, Allison would not be a bit surprised if Jethro had gone to Ziva tonight.

While she would not be surprised to know where he had been, Allison had no intention of asking him. She reasoned, while soaking in a hot bubble bath, that if Jethro had gone to Ziva he most likely would not want her to know. If there was something between them outside of work he would not want her to know that either. She had a hard time believing Jethro was cheating on her; in fact she doubted he was. Allison knew Jethro would not lie to her so to protect herself and him as well, she just wouldn't ask. She wondered for a while what it had been that Jethro had wanted to talk to her about earlier. She thought he had been unreasonably upset by her news. The thought crossed her mind that he was going to break up with her. If so and if that is what he wanted she would accommodate him. Allison knew she was in love with Jethro but she was smart enough to know he was not really in love with her. They enjoyed each other, got along very well and rarely had any serious disagreements. They had survived a very rocky beginning and now, she thought they would see if they could survive this very unexpected development in their relationship.

Having a baby was not something Allison had planned of course and if she was honest about it she was terrified by the thought. She knew Jethro loved children and had a way with them but she had little experience in the baby or kid department. She had always expected to have a husband and children but her career had taken her down a different path and that idea had slowly faded into the background. Now it was certainly front and center. The idea of being a single parent had almost zero appeal for her but if Jethro was not going to be around she knew she'd have to figure things out for herself. It was all up to him at this point. Allison hoped with all her heart they could work things out and be together but she wanted to be strong enough to let Jethro go if he didn't truly want to be with her.

Hearing the doorbell, Allison looked through the peephole and saw Jethro standing in the hallway looking a bit worse for the wear. He looked up at the door and she saw how tired he was. Taking a deep breath, Allison opened the door.

"Hey."

Jethro wondered if he looked as tired as he suddenly felt. From the look on Allison's face he figured he didn't look too good. She smiled a very tiny smile at him and stepped back opening the door for him.

"Hey yourself."

"Ali, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want me here but I'd like to talk if you feel like it."

"Come on in. You look exhausted Jethro come in and sit down. Do you want coffee or a drink?"

"No thanks."

Jethro made his way to the sofa and sat down. He watched as Allison turned off the television and sat down on the end of the sofa. She tucked one leg under and sat facing him.

"I'm sorry I left you earlier. I needed to think and I didn't …"

"It's okay. Did you find what you needed?"

Allison deliberately avoided asking him where he'd gone because she didn't really want to know and since she knew Jethro wouldn't lie, she didn't ask.

"Yeah. I want you to know I want to be a father to our child."

"Well, you are the father Jethro, there's no doubt about that."

"No I mean I want to be a dad. I want to be here with you and our child. I want us to be a family, Ali."

"Jethro I don't want you to stay with me out of some sense of responsibility or guilt or whatever. We never talked about the future and we certainly never talked about having a child. I will accept it if you don't want this."

"But I do have a responsibility to you and to our child. I can't just walk away and pretend I don't."

"If that is the only reason you're here I don't want you with me. I don't want to wake up some day with a man who resents me and our child for tying him down to a family he didn't want."

"Allison that would not happen. Look, I know we never talked about the future and kids and all that but that doesn't mean we can't talk about it now. You're not tying me down. I'm with you because I like how we are together. I'm happy with you and I want us to stay together. I won't lie and say I wasn't surprised by this baby but that doesn't mean I don't want him. Or her."

"What would you have said last month if I'd asked you if you wanted to have a child together?"

"What difference does that make now? We have a child together. Maybe….obviously we didn't plan this but here we are. Wait. Do you want me to stay? Are you trying to tell me you don't want us to work this out and be a family?'

"No! Of course I'm not saying that."

Allison got up and began walking back and forth behind the sofa. Jethro closed his eyes and sighed. Maybe he had been worried about the wrong things. Maybe Allison was the one who didn't want a family. Then the thought struck him that maybe she didn't want the baby. He hadn't really given her a chance to say anything since she dropped the bomb on him and he walked out. What if she…?"

Jethro, suddenly energized with panic, got up and stepped in front of Allison stopping her in her tracks. He put his hands carefully on her shoulders and looked her in the eye.

"Ali, do you want this baby?"

Allison saw the panic on his face and knew for the first time that he truly did want this child.

"Yes. Yes, Jethro I do. I admit the first few days I was panicked and I thought, very briefly, about getting…about not keeping it and never telling you but then I realized I like the idea of having your child. I like it very much."

She saw the relief pass through him and when he pulled her in close she wrapped her arms around him and felt that safety that she always felt in Jethro's arms.

"I'm glad. You know, I think I'd like that drink now."

Allison poured him two fingers of bourbon and got herself a bottle of water. Jethro pulled her down on the couch next to him and she leaned into his side resting her head on his shoulder. Jethro sipped his drink and finally felt the tension of the past few hours seeping away. The emotional roller coaster he had been on took its toll and by the time his bourbon was gone so was he.

Listening to Jethro's deep breathing, Allison knew he was asleep. Again she wondered about where he'd been earlier and knew in her heart he had gone to Ziva. Whatever had happened between those two she knew it wouldn't be an issue between her and Jethro. She trusted him explicitly and knew once he committed to her and their child he would be true to them. Semper Fi was not just a slogan to Jethro; it was a way of life.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 4**

**FOUR MONTHS LATER**

"Okay, so you two still want to be surprised?"

Jethro and Allison exchanged a look that was mostly raised eyebrows and quizzical smirks.

"Up to you, Ali."

"Yes, we want to wait. Okay?"

"Yeah. Okay by me."

The technician smiled at the seemingly happy expectant parents.

"In that case here's a picture that won't give it away."

She handed them each an ultrasound picture that sure enough, did not reveal the gender of their baby.

"You have one that show's the sex?"

"Sure Agent Gibbs. But you don't want that one. Right?"

"Right. No, of course we don't."

"Okay, I'll see you in a couple of months then."

"Thanks Cheryl, we appreciate it."

"My pleasure. Take care and call us if you have any problems or questions."

Jethro and Allison left the doctor's office and walked together to their cars. They had arrived separately from their respective jobs for the six month check-up. So far all was well with the baby and Allison was experiencing a remarkably easy and uneventful pregnancy for which they were both grateful. After all they had enough stress in their lives without having health problems intrude.

"Are you heading home or do you have to go back to work?"

"I'm finished at the office. I have some files with me so I'm going home. To the house. Any idea when you'll be home?"

"Probably by six at the latest. Just need to check in with Ducky and make sure everything is what we expected. Want me to pick up something for dinner?"

"I was going to fix pork chops if that's okay with you."

"Sure, that sounds good. Okay, I'll see you later."

Before he could get away, Allison snagged his hand and held on.

"Jethro are you alright? You seem very distracted and I don't know, you just seem like there's something bothering you."

"I'm fine. I'm a little worried about this case but that's it. Don't worry Ali."

He leaned down and kissed her softly on the mouth and looked her in the eyes. He knew she didn't believe him and he also knew she was right. There was something bothering him but he couldn't explain it to her. Mainly because he couldn't explain it to himself. He wanted to feel something more than he did with her and he was beginning to fear that wasn't going to happen. He wanted to feel a thrill when he saw her, an ache when she was away or at least something more than the complacent feeling he had these days. He kept telling himself things would get better but nothing was changing. Jethro began to think maybe _he_ was what needed to change. All he had to do now was figure out how.

"Be careful on the way home and I'll see you later."

"Bye."

Allison let go of his hand and they parted. On the way home they both reflected on the months that had passed since that fateful night when Allison had told him she was pregnant.

_The past four months had been challenging for both of them but they were working through things as they came up and for the most part they were happy together. Allison was living most of the time with Jethro but still had her apartment. They had discussed her moving in totally but until now that decision had not been made. After the initial shock of the pregnancy had worn off and they agreed to stay together, Jethro had asked Allison to marry him. She said no. They were up almost all night one Friday night talking about it and while they both said they thought eventually they would get married neither of them were determined it had to be right now. _

_Allison spent a good deal of that night convincing Jethro she didn't care about his previous marriages and did not worry about them getting divorced down the line. She told him over and over again that she trusted him, believed in him and knew he would always be there for their child and for her. It always amazed her that a man so confident in almost everything he did suffered so much self doubt in his personal life. Somewhere in that conversation Allison told him she loved him. Jethro didn't respond and she was okay with that. She knew she was ahead of him in the feelings department but she had every confidence he would catch up. _

_They had spent Thanksgiving with Jethro's father so he could meet Allison and Jethro could tell him about the baby in person. Jackson seemed pleased to meet Allison and of course, he was thrilled a new grandchild was on the way. He wondered about the relationship because he didn't think Jethro and Allison seemed to be in love. At least not the way he had seen his son in love with Shannon. He told himself this was different; Jethro was a different person now and times had changed. Jackson thought Allison was nice enough but he was surprised Jethro had taken up with a lawyer. After Allison explained what sort of work she did he felt better about her and the fact she was an attorney. All in all they had a nice holiday and Jackson agreed to join them in DC for Christmas._

_When Christmas rolled around Jethro considered asking Allison to marry him again but he didn't. Again, they had a nice holiday and enjoyed the time off work but there wasn't really any magic in the house. Jackson worried that Jethro and Allison were not going to last but Jethro assured him things were okay. That pretty much described things; they were just okay. Nothing special and nothing particularly bad either. _

_After learning of Allison's pregnancy and ending things with Jethro, Ziva had gone back to Israel for two months to care for her father who it turned out was dying of cancer. After his funeral, she came back to the States but to the chagrin of everyone involved at NCIS she did not go back to work. At least not there. She went to work for the Secret Service and seemed very happy there. At least that's what Abby reported after every time they went out together. Jethro had seen her when she first came back of course and they talked about her situation and the fact that she didn't think she could continue working with him every day. He was disappointed but understood and secretly he was relieved. He gave her the name of a friend of his at the Treasury Department who helped her get a great job as a security consultant with the Secret Service. Her citizenship application was being fast tracked so she could eventually be a Federal Agent._

_After Ziva had been back for almost a month, she and Jethro met for lunch one Thursday. They talked about her father's death, and work and of course, Allison and the baby. They considered themselves friends and they never spoke of what might have been. Ziva thought Jethro seemed happy and she told him she was glad to be back in the United States and loved her new job. She was able to put her Mossad training to use working with advance teams to plan and secure sites where diplomats or important politicians would be visiting. She worked mostly in the US but was able to travel as well. She promised to stay in touch with the team and so far she was. Jethro made her promise to be careful and be happy. As he watched her walk away that day he felt the familiar tug on his heart he always felt in her presence. He missed her but he knew he was where he was supposed to be. _

When Jethro got home that night he was greeted with the aroma of dinner actually cooked at home instead of delivered. Truth be told he and Allison didn't eat much take out any more because it wasn't healthy for the baby. Coming home to real food was one thing Jethro definitely liked about their situation. Allison was a good cook and Jethro was always an appreciative eater.

"Smells good. Anything I can do to help?"

Allison turned around from the sink and Jethro leaned in and gave her a kiss.

"You could set the table and then we can eat. Your timing was perfect."

Their dinner was, as usual, shared in a mostly comfortable silence. Allison usually tried to engage Jethro in conversation about the case his team was working on or something mundane that she thought he might talk about. Lately, he was less talkative than usual and that was saying something. She was feeling more and more like Jethro was pulling away from her instead of growing closer. She had hoped the baby would bring them closer and in some ways it had but try as she might, Allison could not shake the feeling that Jethro was not really committed to them. He was at every doctor's appointment and certainly paid attention to her every need but something was missing. She tried to tell herself she was nitpicking and maybe she was. She loved Jethro and wanted him to be happy. Her fear was he was not going to be happy with her.

Jethro watched Allison during dinner and knew she was picking up on his lack of feeling or enthusiasm or whatever he was lacking. He felt like they were going backward in their relationship and it was his fault. He knew Allison loved him and he wanted to love her. He just couldn't figure out how to make that happen. He was excited about the baby but he knew he wasn't showing her that. If he could only figure out why he was shutting down he would do something to fix it but he couldn't. In the past he always blamed his emotional distance on his feelings about losing Shannon and Kelly but he and Allison had talked about that way back in the beginning of their seeing each other and he knew that was just an excuse now. He kept telling himself he wanted a family but he felt like he was letting it slip away.

That night as they get ready for bed Allison made a decision. When Jethro came to bed she put her book down and said a silent prayer that she was doing the right thing.

"Jethro, I'm moving back to my apartment tomorrow."

Jethro froze next to the bed. This was what he was afraid of; the woman he cared for was leaving. And this time she was taking his child.

"What? Why?"

"Because you need to figure out what you really want, Jethro. You're not happy and I want to give you some space so you can get your head together. You know I'm right."

"But Allison I don't want you to leave. I know I've been off lately but I don't want to lose you and the baby."

"You won't lose us if you really want to be a family Jethro, but I'm not sure you really, truly want that. I'm not giving up on us but I need to see if I can be alone in case you decide you can't make a commitment to us."

Jethro felt a sense of desperation seeping into his psyche. He did not want to lose this chance for a family, for happiness, but he knew Allison was right; he needed to get his head straight.

"Promise you won't give up on me, Ali. I know I haven't been what you deserve but I want to be. I want to be the man you and our child deserve. Please don't give up on us."

"Jethro, I love you, I think you know that. This is not about the kind of man you are. You are the best man I have ever known. I have known from the moment I told you I was pregnant that you were struggling with how you felt about us. To be honest I had the feeling that night that if I hadn't told you I was pregnant you were going to break up with me. Am I right?"

Allison had not intended to ever have this discussion but tonight she felt like she was fighting for her future and she wanted all the cards out on the table.

Jethro sat down on the side of the bed and reached for her hand. He didn't want to look her in the eyes but he knew she deserved his honesty.

"Yes. I was going to end our relationship. I'm sorry Ali."

"Don't be sorry, Jethro. It was because of Ziva wasn't it? It's okay, I've suspected from the very beginning that the two of you had a special bond."

Jethro just sighed and hung his head. He didn't need to say anything but oddly enough he did.

"Yes, Ziva and I had figured out that we had feelings for each other while you were gone. I was going to break up with you so we could see where that went."

Silence reigned in the bedroom for an uncomfortably long time and all either of them could hear was their own breathing. Jethro took a deep breath and tightened his grip on Allison's hand. He knew he had hurt her again and he desperately wanted to make it better.

"Ali, I want you to know that as soon as you told me you were pregnant I knew I wanted to stay with you and our child. I was shocked, yes, but I never considered for a moment not being here for you. When I left that night I went to tell Ziva we couldn't be together. I admit, that was hard for me to do but I swear to you, I never once considered leaving you."

Allison saw the pain in his eyes and heard the sadness in his voice and she knew he was telling her the truth. It all made perfect sense; Ziva going back to Israel and then coming back and going to work for the Secret Service. They apparently knew enough to stay away from each other. She knew Jethro would never cheat on her because that was not the kind of man he was. His sense of honor and responsibility was just part of why she loved him.

"I believe you Jethro. But I still think we need some time apart. I know you say you want us to be a family but you have to admit you're having trouble with the idea. Right?"

"I don't know what's wrong. I do want us to be a family. Maybe you're right. Maybe some time apart will let me get my head together. But I worry about you Ali. And the baby."

"I'm very capable of taking care of myself and this little one for a while. I will talk to you every day if that makes you feel better. We're both in perfect health you heard that for yourself today. Jethro, take some time off. I know you have plenty of vacation time and Tony can handle things for a while. Go to the cabin. Go see your dad. Get away from here and let yourself breathe for a while."

"When will you come back?"

"Let's see how things go. A minimum of two weeks. Don't put a deadline on this, Jethro. I want you to be sure of what you want before we do anything else."

"Okay." Jethro looked at her and searched her face for any sign she didn't want him to stay. "Do you want me to sleep in the other room tonight?"

"No, absolutely not! This is not about me not wanting to be with you Jethro. I love you. I want you with me. What I'm trying to tell you is I want ALL of you, not just the part of you that tells you this is where you're SUPPOSED to be. You know I don't like to sleep without you."

"I don't want you to go Ali."

"Jethro, please, you know we need to do this."

"Alright. But let's not think about that anymore tonight."

"Agreed."

Jethro did exactly as Allison wished that night; he made love to her and held her until she fell asleep in his arms. He was tender and considerate and as always made her feel cherished and drove her out of her mind at the same time. Their sex life had never been any sort of issue or problem for them. They enjoyed each other and were happy to give of themselves to satisfy the other's needs and desires. Tonight had been no different. As Jethro lay there thinking about their future he knew he didn't want to lose Allison.

For so long he had tried to keep her at arms length; just in case something happened, but now he realized, he couldn't imagine his life without her. He didn't need to go to the cabin or to visit his father to know that what he had wanted for so long was right there in his arms; a woman who loved and accepted him and their child growing inside her. It was very clear to him that he wanted to stay with Allison and now he knew he had to show her how much he wanted them to be a family. Talking was not how he and Allison communicated best. They were people of actions not words and Jethro began that night to plan the actions he needed to take to convince Allison he was serious about them and happy in their relationship.

Sleep didn't come easily to Jethro that night and unfortunately just three hours after he finally dozed off his phone woke him up. There was a dead Marine in Rock Creek Park and his nights rest was officially over. Jethro quickly dressed and when Allison roused and looked at him sleepily he sat down beside her.

"Hey, sorry I woke you . I gotta go. Go back to sleep."

"What time is it?"

"Just after four. I'll call you later, okay?"

"Okay. Be careful, Jethro. I love you."

"I will. Will you be here when I come home?"

Allison looked at him and knew he was taking advantage of her sleepy condition. But, she didn't care; she loved him and wanted to be with him. She simply wasn't strong enough to send him away or leave him.

"Yes. I'll be here. Go on."

Jethro leaned down and kissed her and then kissed her again. He brushed her hair back from her face and looked at her and felt for the first time in a long time that he was where he not only needed to be but wanted to be.

Allison had closed her eyes and he thought she was asleep. He brushed one last soft kiss across her forehead and said, "Love you". Then he was gone.

Allison didn't move until she heard the front door close. Then she covered her face with her hands and cried with relief. It wasn't the glorious declaration of love most women would want but to Allison it was more than enough. It wasn't the first time Jethro had said those words to her but it was the first time she thought he really meant them and wasn't just saying them to make her feel good. She rolled over and fell back to sleep with a smile on her face and peace in her heart.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 5**

In an unusual twist the case they got didn't keep Jethro and his team busy for days and nights on end. In fact, they had it settled by three o'clock that afternoon. What had appeared to be a suicide really was just that and the case was closed. Jethro went to the Director's office to update him on the case and to arrange for some time off. Despite Allison saying she would be at home when he got there he knew she would still want them to have the time apart. He had decided during the day what he was going to do to convince Allison he wanted to be with her and he needed a couple of weeks off work to get it all done. Now he had to figure out how to make sure she did leave house without tipping his hand or hurting her feelings. That was going to be a challenge.

While Jethro was solving his case, Allison was busy at work trying to figure out how to convince him they needed some time apart in case he tried to change her mind. She had to admit that she too needed some time to breathe, some time away from Jethro just to be sure she knew what she wanted for the rest of her life. If they were going to be together, raise a child together, it was going to mean a lifetime together and they had never, until she announced her pregnancy, talked about anything approaching forever. Sure they'd talked about it since then but that didn't count. They were under pressure by then and with Jethro's very large sense of honor and responsibility he wouldn't even consider them not being together. Allison was ninety-nine point nine percent sure she wanted to spend her life with Jethro but some time apart before the baby came couldn't hurt. Right?

As it turned out Jethro didn't have to worry about getting Allison out of the house and Allison didn't have to worry about convincing him they needed some time away from each other. Her job took care of all that. Just as she was getting ready to leave for the day the office manager told her she had a call.

"Hello, this is Allison Hart."

"Allison, it's Joyce. I'm so glad I caught you."

"Joyce, what's wrong? You sound funny."

Joyce was a co-worker who had not come into to work today because she was scheduled to travel to Boston tomorrow for a presentation.

"I fell and broke my ankle on the way to my car this afternoon."

"Oh my god! Where are you? Are you okay?"

"I'm at the emergency room. Luckily, Travis was at home. Look, I'm not going to be able to go to the conference in Boston tomorrow. They're telling me I'll probably have to have surgery in a few days. Can you possibly go in my place? You know the presentation and the cases at least as well as I do."

Allison quickly glanced at her calendar and mentally rearranged her schedule for the next week. This was actually a godsend for her even though a terrible thing for her friend.

"As a matter of fact I can do it. It won't be a problem at all. How shall I get the presentation materials from you?"

"I left a copy of the whole thing in my office. I thought it would be a good idea to have two sets of materials for an emergency or if we needed to be two places at once. I guess this is the emergency. Thank you so much, Allison. Are you sure you're feeling up to it?"

"Yes, I'm fine and actually this is perfect timing for me to be out of town for a few days. I'm just sorry you are hurt. I'll let Gary and Ruth know you're gone for a few days but will call them later."

"That's perfect. Thanks again Allison. Here comes my doctor so I'll talk to you later."

"Bye and I hope all goes well."

When Jethro got home he was happy to see Allison's car in the driveway and was a little bit relieved when he saw her suitcase sitting in the hallway by the front door.

"Ali, you upstairs?"

"Yes, I'm here. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Why? And why is your suitcase down here?"

"You sounded panicked. My bag is there because I have to go out of town for work tomorrow."

Jethro walked into the bedroom to find Allison folding laundry. Her toiletry bag was on the counter in the bathroom and three suits were in a garment bag hanging on the closet door. Jethro walked up to her and took the tee shirt she was folding out of her hands and kissed her. It was getting tricky to get as close as he wanted to with the baby in the way but he managed a good hug and another very good kiss.

"Where are you going?"

"To Boston. Joyce was supposed to go for a conference but she broke her ankle today and can't go, obviously. She and I have worked on this presentation together so she asked me to go in her place."

"Too bad about her ankle. You sure you're up to traveling?"

"Jethro, I'm pregnant not an invalid. Of course I'm up to traveling. I'm only going to Boston."

"Sorry, but you know I worry. How long will you be gone?"

"The conference is over Saturday at noon but I thought I'd stay and visit some friends from school and then go up to Newport and visit my parents for a few days. So, I'll be gone for about two weeks."

She looked at him and waited for the argument she was sure he would put up. For the first time in a long time she was wrong about what he was thinking.

"I guess considering our conversation last night this is pretty good timing."

"Yes I suppose it is. Jethro, why aren't you arguing with me about this? About me being gone so long."

"I told you last night I'd go along with you wanting us to be apart. This works out. I'm not mad, Ali. I don't like the idea of you being gone so long but hey, what can I do?"

"Where is Special Agent Gibbs and who are you?"

"Very funny. Do you need any help?"

"You could order dinner. I'm craving pepperoni thin crust pizza."

"I can do that."

"Jethro?"

"Yeah."

"I love you."

Jethro stepped back into her space and kissed her again. When he pulled away he ran his fingers through her hair and leaned his forehead on hers.

"I'm glad you do."

Allison left early the next morning. Jethro drove her to the airport even though she insisted she could easily call a cab.

"I want to take you. Promise me you'll call me tonight."

"Yes, I'll call. Please don't worry about me Jethro. Pregnant women travel and work all the time. And, we agreed to some time apart anyway. Are you going to the cabin?"

"No, I think I'll call dad and see what he's doing. Maybe go up there."

"Do not go back to work! You promise me that. I mean it Jethro, if I find out you're at work you'll be sorry."

"Really? What does that mean exactly?"

"I'm serious, take some time off and relax and think about what you want."

"I won't go back to work. I promise."

Jethro hadn't lied when he said he'd call his dad; he never said he was going up to see his father because he wasn't. He called his dad and asked him if he could come and help him with some projects at home. Of course Jackson was thrilled with the idea and said he'd be on his way later that day. Jethro had more than just a couple of small projects in mind for the next two weeks but there was plenty his dad could do to help. And, he wanted to talk to his dad about all the stuff that was crowding his mind. For all their differences Jethro had finally learned that his father had some very useful wisdom when it came to matters of the heart.

By the time Allison had arrived in Boston and settled in her hotel, Jethro had called two contractor buddies and bribed them with fifteen percent over their going rate to postpone the jobs they were on and come to work for him for the next two weeks. He promised all the pizza, soda and beer they wanted and they knew he would be working just as hard as they did so they were happy to make the deal. After they had met at the house and heard what all he wanted to get done in such a short time they almost backed out of the deal. Jethro had an ambitious list of changes he wanted to make and it took all his considerable powers of persuasion to convince the men they would get it all done-or at least most of it-in just two weeks.

When Jackson arrived that evening he found Jethro in the kitchen tearing out the cabinets.

"What the heck is going on son?"

"Got some remodeling to do and I'm hoping you can help. Bring your work clothes?"

Jethro put down his crowbar and went to his father who was standing in the doorway with a smile on his face. He hugged Jackson who dropped his bag and embraced his son with a tight grip that belied his years.

"All is have is work clothes. Not sure how much help I'll be but I'm willing."

"What I really need is moral support and someone to talk to. I have contractors coming tomorrow but there will be plenty you can help with. I'm glad you're here dad."

"Is Allison here? Are things alright, Leroy?"

"She's in Boston on business and then she'll be visiting family for a week or so. Things are fine. Well, maybe not fine but okay. It's a long story."

"That what this is all about?"

"Yeah. Let's sit down and I'll fill you in."

The Gibbs men sat in the living room with a drink each and Jethro filled his dad in on the situation with Allison. He explained that she wanted them to spend some time apart and why.

"Do you know what you want, son?"

"Yeah, I want her and the baby. I want a family, dad. I don't think I can convince her with words. I'm not good enough with them for that. So, I want to show her that I'm serious about us being a family right here in this house."

"So you're giving her a new kitchen? Think that'll do it?"

"Not just a kitchen. A new bathroom in the master bedroom, new paint all over and floors redone. This is all stuff we talked about one day a long time ago. Even before she got pregnant she talked to me about updating the house so I let her pick out colors and stuff just sort of for fun. We never talked about it again. You know, we were just talking; nothing serious. Kinda like our whole relationship at that point."

"But now you're sure you want to be with this lady the rest of your life?"

"Yeah, I am."

"And if there was no baby involved? Would you have asked her to marry you, done all this for her?"

Jethro hesitated just a few seconds too long and his father knew he had asked the right question. Or the wrong one depending on how you looked at it.

"Maybe that's not my business. You don't have to answer that if you don't want to."

"I want to. Before I knew Allison was pregnant I was not going to stay with her. Yes, the baby changed that. Changed a lot of things. At first I was staying because I thought it was what I should do. And I don't want to be a part time father. But over the past few months I've come to realize I do care a lot for Allison. Sometimes, a lot of the time actually, I feel like I love her. It's not like with Shannon but it's a lot more than any of the others. I can't really explain it dad, but I know this is what I need and want to do."

"You know I want you to be happy, son. I like Allison and I got the feeling when you were at the house for Thanksgiving that she loves you and wants to be with you. Right?"

"Yes. At least she says so. I believe her. We have overcome a lot since we started seeing each other. Our beginning wasn't good, in fact it was pretty negative so we had a lot of stuff to work out and I think we've come a long way. Obviously. Anyway, I want to do the remodeling and updating to show her I'm serious. I never changed a thing in this house for anyone else and she knows that so I think she'll understand what I'm doing means I want her here."

"Then I'm here to help any way I can. For the record, like I said, I like Allison and I think the two of you will make this work."

For the next ten days Jethro worked dawn to dark and then some. The contractors he had hired were there bright and early every morning and before long the kitchen was completely gutted and then new cabinets, new flooring and new appliances put in place. Jethro had rented a storage pod and all the furniture he was keeping and basically everything in the house was put in the pod for the duration of the remodeling. All the floors were sanded and refinished. The master bathroom was given the same treatment as the kitchen; gutted and completely redone to include a spa tub and walk-in shower. Jethro even managed to figure out a way to increase the closet size which he knew Allison would appreciate.

Once the major construction was finished, new contractors came in to repaint the entire house. Luckily, Jethro had taken note of the colors Allison liked and soon the house looked brand new. For two days Jethro concentrated most of his efforts on turning what had been Kelly's room into a nursery. Since they didn't know whether they were having a boy or a girl he chose pale green walls with white trim. Kelly's bassinette and baby bed, were taken from the attic to the basement where Jackson meticulously cleaned them and put on a fresh coat of stain. He was happy that Jethro had kept these and was now ready and able to use them again. It seemed such a very long time ago that the two of them had spent so many hours building both pieces.

"They look great dad. Thanks for doing this."

"It's my pleasure. I'm thrilled you have use for them again. Little surprised you kept them all this time."

Jethro ran his fingers lovingly over the smooth wood of the crib. He had a faraway look in his eyes; the look he always got when he thought about Kelly.

"Just couldn't get rid of them. Thought about loaning them to Fornell when Emily was born but then thought better of it."

Jackson laughed. "I'm glad you had that second thought. No telling what she might have done with them if she even let them in the house."

Allison had been calling every evening but Jethro didn't let on what he was doing at home. He told her his father had decided to visit and they were spending a lot to time doing odds and ends and talking about things. He never outright lied to her and consoled his conscience with the knowledge he was _surprising_ her, not keeping _secrets_. The more time Jethro spent talking to his dad and working in the house the more sure he was of his decision to stay with Allison and build a life with her. The feelings for Ziva he had first fought for so long and then hidden were fading away along with the old paint and furniture in his house. He still cared for her, worried about her safety, and wanted her to be happy but he knew he was no longer really a part of her life, nor she his. And he was okay with that.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 6**

One evening as he and Jack were enjoying a beer on the back deck, Jethro's friend Tobias Fornell dropped by unexpectedly. Jethro and Fornell had been friends for a long time and both had had the misfortune of marrying Diane. Luckily for Tobias, he got a beautiful daughter out of the deal. All Jethro got was an empty bank account and seven stitches in his forehead. Fornell knew about the baby coming but not about the house remodeling. As he walked in the house he was stunned at the changes being made. As long as he had known Jethro nothing had ever been changed in the house. Now it looked like everything had been. He heard Jethro and Jack in the back and stopped at the fridge to get himself a beer.

"My god, you two have been busy." Fornell stepped onto the deck and greeted the Gibbs men.

"Hey, come on out and join us.

"Hello, Jack. Good to see you."

"You too, Tobias. How are you?"

"I'm well. What's going on Jethro? Selling the place?"

"No, just doing some long needed updating. Got a baby coming you know. Thought the place could use it."

"Well, it looks great. The kitchen is fabulous. Allison here?"

""She's visiting her parents in Newport. Be home in a few days. This is a surprise for her."

Jack stood up and made to leave. "I think I'll go have a shower and order us some supper. Tobias, will you stay and eat pizza with us?"

"No thanks Jack I have to go back to the office in a little while. It was good to see you."

"You too. Leroy, I'll order after I get cleaned up."

"Thanks dad."

When Jack had gone in the house, Tobias looked at his friend and shook his head. "What's really going on Jethro? You have had three wives in this house and never did more than change a light bulb. Why the sudden urge to remodel?"

Jethro smirked at his favorite FBI agent. The one who knew him too well. "Allison isn't convinced I want to make a family with her and the baby. I tell her I do but she thinks I'm not really sure. Figured this would show her I'm serious."

"So, you really do want to marry her and live happily ever after."

"Hopefully."

"You do know she's a lawyer right?" Tobias asked with a chuckle.

Jethro laughed too and said, "I do know that. But she's doing good work now. And you know me, I might need a good lawyer one of these days."

"No doubt. Seriously, Jethro, are you sure about this? I never got the sense you were moving in this direction with Ms. Hart. Is this because of the baby?"

Jethro was silent for a while as he contemplated why everyone seemed to doubt his intentions. But hell, he doubted them himself sometimes; less and less every day but still…..

"The baby changed things. Sort of upped the ante I guess you'd say. Don't want to be a part time dad or watch someone else raise my child."

"I understand that. Just be careful my friend. Don't give this baby a job he or she can't handle."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, holding two people together is too much of a job for a baby. Just be sure you want Allison as much as you want the baby or it will never work and then you will be miserable. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about."

"I hear ya."

"Gotta get back to the office. The house looks great. I want only the best for you Jethro so just be sure."

"Thanks Tobias."

After Fornell left Jethro sat on the deck and looked out over his backyard. His eyes swept over the flower beds he and Shannon had built together so long ago and the place where Kelly had her swing set and sand box. He pictured a new child running in the yard, playing in the sprinkler and swinging on a new swing set. He wanted that so much he could almost see it happening then and there. Jethro told himself he would do anything to make it happen that way but then he thought about Tobias and Diane and Emily. Tobias loved his daughter more than anything but that didn't keep his marriage together. Would he and Allison eventually fall apart and his child grow up without a full time dad? He couldn't know the future but he did know his past and that was not an encouragement. Jethro closed his eyes and said a silent prayer that he was doing the right thing.

That night Jethro lay awake for a long time after he went to bed. He kept thinking about what Tobias had said and wondering if he really loved Allison enough. Or in the right way. Or for the right reasons. He let his mind drift back to their beginning which had been on anything but good terms. He had thought of her as a hateful, vindictive bitch but somehow even in those very first days, he was intrigued by her. She was doing everything in her power to hurt him or at least screw with his career but when push came to shove she had helped the Director by giving him information on what Colonel Bell had been doing. By the time the whole fiasco with the Reynosa cartel was over Allison was firmly on his side and willing to defend him no matter what.

Jethro began drifting off to sleep thinking about their first kiss and where it had taken them.

_When he came home that night and found her sitting in his living room he was furious. They exchanged words and he had every intention of throwing her out. But then she stepped into his space and he moved just a bit closer and looked in her eyes and smelled her perfume and that was that. He tried to stay angry with her but it didn't work. Once he was that close to those beautiful blue eyes and that silky black hair he couldn't help himself. Ego aside it was apparent to him that she wanted him to kiss her and since that aligned perfectly with what he wanted that is exactly what he did. _

_He leaned in and she leaned in and their lips met very briefly once, twice and then finally on the third touch they got serious. His arm being in a sling was a minor hindrance but he managed. He pulled her in tight with his left arm and then held her against his body as he kissed her very thoroughly. Allison wrapped both arms around his waist and pressed against him matching all the effort he was putting into the kiss with effort and intention of her own. Jethro remembered that kiss as one of the best he'd had in a really long time. _

_They didn't go much further than that kiss that night. He had sure wanted to but since he didn't really trust her at that point he stopped himself and settled for that one wonderful kiss that had seemed so full of possibilities. Allison kept showing up where he least expected her and when Shannon's mom was in trouble and Jethro couldn't bring himself to send her to prison he had asked for Allison's help. He'd made sure she was there when he met with his former mother-in-law in his basement and got her to confess to murder. Alison had played it perfectly, never giving away that she knew exactly what he'd done. They started seeing each other pretty regularly after that and slowly but surely Allison had managed to work around or through all his defenses. _

_While many people who knew him thought of Jethro Gibbs as a recluse who spent all his free time in his basement, that was not really the case. Gibbs was very careful about his personal life but he did have one. He dated on and off and was not a monk by any measure. The thing was Jethro dated for the sole purpose of having a nice evening out; he wasn't looking for love and commitment or anything other than some female company once in a while with no strings attached. There seemed to be plenty of women with the same intentions so he actually had a fairly busy and healthy social life. He just kept it so far off the radar that no one knew about it and that was fine with him. All that went out the window when Allison came into the picture. _

_Much to his dismay, Jethro found he liked being around Allison and missed her when she wasn't there. He might initially be put out when he came home late at night and found her car in the driveway but when she greeted him with a kiss and a meal he was happy to have her there. Oddly enough, considering she's a lawyer, she didn't ask a lot of questions. She was happy to just be there and was willing to talk about her day and her cases without expecting Jethro to reciprocate. If there was something perplexing about one of his cases, he found that Allison had a sharp, inquisitive mind and often came up with an idea or angle he hadn't thought of that proved to be helpful. In short, Allison was easy to be with and when he let her, she took good care of him. _

_The more time they spent together the more Jethro found himself with an unfamiliar feeling-happiness. He was comfortable having Allison in his house fairly often but she was not living there. She came and went and even though she often spent the night they would also go days at a time without seeing each other. Jethro sometimes went to her apartment but for the most part the time they spent together was at his house. After about two months of seeing her pretty regularly, Jethro realized that when Allison spent the night he slept much better. He could attribute some of that to the fact that they had a very satisfying sex life but he also knew he was more relaxed and content than he had been in a long time. He came to appreciate waking up with Allison sprawled over him and it didn't hurt that she rarely declined early morning sex. _

_Jethro was a traditionalist; some would say chauvinist, in most aspects of his life and that included how he treated a woman. He appreciated that Allison was a woman who could take care of herself but was not adverse to letting him open the door for her or carry in the groceries. He was very protective of the people he cared about and that extended to all aspects of their relationship. He was a thoughtful and attentive lover and always tried to make sure Allison got what she needed or wanted when they were together. When they became lovers he discovered she was a very tactile person and that made their sex life lots of fun. She liked to be touched and he surely enjoyed touching her, tasting her and exploring all the places that make her breath catch. Of course he also liked the fact that she seemed to always be able to make put a hitch in his breathing as well. _

_When they had been together for about three months Jethro came home late one night very tired and down about the outcome of their latest case. Allison has spent the night and was already in bed so Jethro quietly took a quick shower and tried to get into bed without waking her. Of course she had known the second he walked in the room that he was there and she was waiting for him to join her. She had leaned over and kissed him and then just started running her hands all over him and talking to him quietly about nothing special. Jethro remembered how he relaxed at the sound of her voice and her touch and soon they were making love. Sweet, slow, passionate love that soothed him and brought him back from the dark place he had been in when he got home. It was that night, as he lay holding her in his arms, about to fall asleep that he realized they had not just had sex; they had made love together. That was important distinction for Jethro and from there on things changed in his mind and eventually in his heart as well._

Allison was due home in two days and the house was all finished. It was almost a miracle how much had been done in just two weeks. Jethro gladly paid his contractor buddies what they were owed plus a bonus for their tireless work. It was the first time he had spent any real money on the house in twenty years and it was money well spent. The day before Allison was due to fly home the new furniture was delivered. There was a new couch and matching chair and a half with ottoman, a new dining table and chairs and new bedroom furniture. Jethro had enlisted the help of his neighbor, Mrs. Parker, to choose window treatments since that was way out of his area of expertise. She helped him pick out plantation shutters for the downstairs and bamboo shades for the bedrooms. She also gave him some advice on new linens and towels. She was amazed at the changes in the house and told him so.

"Jethro you have done a magnificent job. The floors are beautiful, the kitchen is fabulous and the bathroom is to die for. Should I assume this is all for Allison's benefit?"

"It is. Hoping to convince her to stay for the next thirty years or so."

"Well, if she doesn't let me know and I'll move in."

"What about Dan?"

"He can stay in our house. Really, Jethro, it's wonderful. I'm sure she'll love it. When will she be home?"

"Day after tomorrow. Thanks for all your help this week. I'll be sure and give you the credit."

"You're welcome. It was so great to see your dad. Is he still here?"

"Yes, I convinced him to stay and see Allison's reaction. After all he did a lot of work. I'll let you know how she likes it."

There were still odds and ends of furniture to acquire, area rugs to buy and some decorating to be done but Jethro wanted Allison to have a hand in what the house looked like so he was leaving those things to her. And of course the nursery had to be finished; furniture chosen, a rug and the rocking chair Jethro and his father had started on several nights before.

The night before Allison was to return Jethro and his dad were in the basement working together on the rocking chair. All the pieces had been cut and now they were sanding each one by hand. The first coat of stain would go on tonight and the second tomorrow. Jackson had carved an intricate curlicue design in the headpiece.

"That is beautiful dad, Allison will love it."

"Thanks. I think we will need a few more days to really finish this right. It needs at least three coats of stain and varnish, don't you think?"

"Yes, I can keep her out of the basement though, don't worry. You can give it to her before you leave."

"Me? This is from both of us, son."

"You've done most of the work and it's your design. I'm just the helper here. She's going to love it dad. Thanks for doing this. And for all your help with the house. And all the good advice."

"Well, you already knew what you wanted, Leroy. You just needed to say it out loud to someone. You know as well as anyone life is unpredictable. You've been given a gift with this baby coming and you're smart enough to realize that. Allison is a lucky woman."

"I think I'm the lucky one but thanks."

While she was away from DC Allison had a lot of time to think about her future. She spent many hours talking to her mother about the situation with Jethro and how she felt about what was happening. Her mother liked Jethro very much and urged Allison to be patient with him.

"You know honey, he hasn't had very good luck in the love department and while I'm sure he shares the blame for that, you have to realize he's going to be cautious. I'm willing to bet he didn't see himself getting married again."

"No, I doubt if he did. He has told me he expected us to be together only until I found someone I loved and then I'd leave him. Can you imagine? How in the world can you go through life expecting people to disappoint you?"

"From what you've told me that's all he's ever known in his personal life. He really has no experience of having someone love him and stay through all the hard times. Of course his first wife dying is a bit different but it too is a kind of leaving. From the little bit I know, I'd guess he blames himself for her death as well as the divorces. Right?"

"Yes. Which means he's super protective of me and the baby. That's one reason I call him every night; so he'll know we're okay. Sometimes he forgets he's the one with the dangerous job. He doesn't think about how I feel when he leaves in the morning and I don't know if he'll be coming home or not."

"What have your conversations been like since you left?"

"He's very sweet and says he can't wait until I'm home. He talks about our future and says he's excited about the baby. Oh mom, I just love him and I know we'll make it because I'm not willing to give up. I'll wait as long as I have to. I know that sounds pitiful but I can't help it. I want our baby to have his or her father around all the time."

"Has he asked you to marry him again?"

"No."

"Do you want him to?"

"Oh yeah! I'll say yes next time I promise."

"Good for you."

Jethro was thirty minutes early for Allison's flight even considering the time he took to park and get through security so he could meet her at the gate. Sometimes a badge and a friend at the airport came in handy. Sipping on a cup of surprisingly good coffee, Jethro paced the long corridor waiting for the flight from Boston to arrive. Even when planes were on time it seemed to Jethro they had taken too long. He was glad he didn't do much commercial flying; he was still more comfortable in the cargo hold on a canvas seat than crammed into commercial airliner. Finally he saw the door open and moved to stand closer to where the passengers would come out. Allison was the fourth person off the plane so apparently she had been in first class. Jethro made a mental note to thank her boss for that the next time he saw her.

"Hey, welcome home." Jethro took Allison's carry-on and gave her a quick kiss before wrapping her in his arms.

"Well, my goodness I didn't expect you to be down here. What'd you do flash your badge?"

With a smirk he replied, "Somethin' like that."

"Well, I'm glad you did. It's so good to be back and see you."

"I'm glad you're home."

Allison didn't miss that particular way of answering. She was happy when Jethro laced his fingers with hers and led the way to the baggage claim. She was tired and her feet hurt and she was very ready to sit someplace where she could put those aching feet up. She had decided a few days earlier that traveling at almost seven months pregnant was just too much trouble. She was anxious to get home to either Jethro's house or her own cozy apartment.

"Is your dad still here?"

"Yes. He wanted to see you before he left."

"I can stay at the apartment and give you guys the house. I don't mind."

Jethro didn't miss a step but he was disappointed to hear she would be just as glad to go home alone. He determined not to say anything just yet.

"Well, why don't we go to the house and see dad and then if you want some space I'll take you to the apartment. I was hoping you would want to stay with me."

As hard as he tried he couldn't keep the unhappiness out of his voice. He tightened his grip on her hand and leaned down to kiss her softly on the mouth. Allison was taken by surprise because Jethro rarely engaged in any public displays of affection. She had hear the disappointment in his voice and realized he had misunderstood her intentions.

"No, I just don't want to intrude on your time together. I'm very happy to see you Jethro and to be home."

"Dad and I have had two weeks together. We're almost tired of each other. You most certainly would not be intruding."

"Okay, then let's go home."

The ride home was mostly spent in a comfortable silence. Jethro was excited for Allison to see the house and he was confident she would understand the message behind all the changes. He was also nervous so he uncharacteristically filled the silence with conversation.

"How are your parents?"

"Good. Both enjoying their retirement. They're thinking of moving south a ways; maybe to Charleston. They're excited about the baby. They want to come down when she's here."

"She? You have a premonition?"

"No I just don't like referring to our child as 'it'. What have you been doing while I was gone. I mean really, not what you've been telling me on the phone."

"What do you mean? Just like I said, dad and I have been doing little things around the house and catching up."

"You didn't go to work the whole time I was gone?"

"I told you I didn't."

"Jethro, I just can't believe you were in town and managed to stay away from NCIS for two whole weeks."

"You're a skeptic."

The casual, friendly back and forth was a welcome change from the way they had been talking to each other before she left. Allison was suspicious but from the look on his face it did seem true that Jethro had not been to the office. He looked very relaxed and happy. However the closer they got to the house the less talkative he became and Allison thought he seemed nervous. She was right. Jethro was having some vague unsettling doubts about how Allison would react to the changes he'd made. The idea had been to _show_ her how much he wanted them to be together but what if she didn't see that? No, he told himself, she would understand and she would finally accept what he had been trying to tell her all along.

They both felt like a giant, inflatable question mark was along for the ride from the airport. Finally, Allison couldn't take it any longer.

"Have you thought about our situation while I was gone?" Once she had asked she felt stupid. Of course he'd thought about their situation; what else did he have to think about without work? She wanted to take back her silly question but it was too late.

Jethro turned and looked at her while they waited at a red light. She looked nervous and he could tell by the look on her face that she thought she'd asked a stupid question. He reached for her hand and held on as the light changed and they were moving again.

"Haven't thought of much else as a matter of fact."

"I know that was a silly question."

"Ali, I knew before you left that I wanted us to be together and you being gone for the last two weeks didn't change that. I know you were unsure about my intentions when you left but I'm hoping once we get home you'll believe me when I say I want us to be a family."

"I thought about us too. Do you want to know what I decided?"

This made Jethro very nervous because he didn't think she had anything to think about so he was glad they were pulling in the driveway. He turned off the car and turned to look at her. He was barely able to hide the fear in his voice when he asked, "Have you changed your mind and decided you don't want us to be together?"

"No of course not!"

Jethro breathed a sigh of relief.

"Good. Look, I want to show you something in the house and after that we can talk and you can tell me what you decided. Okay?"

"Sure. Let's go in. I'm anxious to see Jack."

"I think he's gone to lunch with Ducky but he'll be back this afternoon."

Jethro got out and took Allison's bags from the trunk as she got out of the car. He noticed she was showing even more after just two weeks away. Her hand went instinctively to her growing stomach as she stood and stretched. She felt like she'd been sitting for days instead of hours. Jethro looked at her and smiled; she was beautiful.

"You look good Ali."

"Ugh. I feel enormous and very stiff after that plane ride."

"For the record you are not enormous. You're beautiful."

"Thank you."

Allison approached the front door and noticed a new door handle and lock.

"You locking the door nowadays?"

"I will be after tonight. At least when you're here. Which I hope will be all the time."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Look, Ali before we go in I want to tell you again that I want us to be a family. I don't want anyone else. I don't have any desire to be with anyone else. I hope when you go in this house you will believe me. I know sometimes I don't say all the things you want or need to hear but hopefully what happens in the next few minutes will speak for me."

"Jethro, you don't have to convince me of your devotion to me and our baby. I believe you. I just wanted you to have some time alone to be sure. I trust you, Jethro and I love you."

"Good."

Jethro pushed open the door and stepped back so Allison could precede him into the house. She walked only a few steps into the house before she stopped and turned back to him.

"Oh my gosh, Jethro. What have you been doing here? It looks beautiful. The floors! And the new paint! And the shutters and oh my gosh, new furniture, everything is beautiful!"

"Go on in and look around."

Jethro set the bags on the floor and followed Allison to the kitchen doorway.

"I hope you like it."

Allison was speechless. The old drab cabinets had been replaced with new, bright white cabinets, there were new granite countertops and new appliances. It was a whole new kitchen and she loved it.

"Oh my. I love it. It's beautiful, Jethro. How did you do all this in just two weeks?"

She threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly. When she let go and stepped back there were tears in her eyes. She realized what he had done and why and she was overwhelmed.

"You did this for me?"

"For us. I wanted to show you I'm serious about our future."

Allison ran her hand over the countertop and spun around to take it all in. There was a new farm style sink, new lighting and the walls were a beautiful, dark orange color; exactly what she had picked out months ago. She hadn't even realized Jethro was listening to her that day. Apparently he had done more than just listen. He had remembered.

"Come on and see the rest."

By the time she had seen the rest of the house excluding the nursery Allison was near tears. She couldn't believe Jethro had done all these things to his house in order to convince her he wanted them to be a family. Jethro had saved the nursery for the last. Allison was still standing in the master bedroom trying to take it all in when he came up behind her and put his arms around her covering their growing child with his big hands. He kissed her hair and soaked in the feel of her in his arms. Jethro was overcome with the strength of his emotions after seeing Allison so delighted with the house. Her reaction was more than he could have hoped for. Now there was one room left to show her; in his mind the most important room in the house.

"Come on, I have one more room to show you."

"I don't think I can take much more. This is so wonderful, Jethro. Thank you so much."

"So…you saying you don't want to see the nursery?"

Jethro came around to stand in front of her. She had tears in her eyes and he kissed them away. Maybe it was the feeling of really starting over that the remodeling gave him or maybe he just finally gave in to what his heart had been trying to tell him for months. Whatever it was Jethro knew for sure in that moment what he needed and wanted to say next. He framed her face in his hands, caressed her cheekbones with his thumbs and kissed her gently on the mouth.

Looking her in the eyes he softly said what she'd wanted to hear for such a long time, "I love you Ali."

"Oh Jethro."

"I. Love. You. I'm sorry I made you wait so long to hear me say that."

"I would have waited as long as you needed me to. I love you back."

Allison kissed him and when she had to breathe she rested her forehead on his and said, "I know what this house means to you Jethro. For you to make all these changes for me is the most generous, loving thing you could possibly done. I don't have the words to tell you how much this means to me. I love you and I promise you I will, when times get tough for us, remember this moment and how much you have done for us to be together."

"You're right, the house means a lot to me. But you mean an awful lot to, Ali. I do love you and I want us to have a good life together. I love this child you are carrying. Maybe I haven't said that but I do. I know things will be hard sometimes but I promise I will never hurt you on purpose. I want to be happy and have a good life with you and our child but you have to remember, I'm out of practice at those things. If you can be patient I think I'll get the hang of it pretty fast."

"I can be very patient where you're concerned, Jethro. I know it won't all be sweetness and light. I can be a bitch you know. We just have to remember we love each other and care about each other and we'll be okay. Now, did you say something about a nursery?"

"I did. Come on."

Jethro took her by the hand and led her across the hall to what had been Kelly's room. As he started to open the door, Allison put her hand on his arm and stopped him.

"Wait. Jethro are you sure? I know this was Kelly's room. You sure you want to use it for our baby?"

"Very sure. I think Kelly would approve of her baby brother or sister having her room. Now, close your eyes and don't open until I say so."

"Okay."

Jethro opened the door and guided Allison into the room and turned her to face the baby bed. Jack had put the rocker in the room before he left even though it still needed another coat of varnish. He wanted her to see it in the room the first time she walked in.

"Okay, you may look."

Allison opened her eyes and gasped. The room was perfect and baby bed was beautiful. How did he remember all the things she said she liked or wanted? Allison turned and saw the rocking chair and cried with delight.

"The chair. Did you make that yourself? It's beautiful. And the bed, Jethro is that Kelly's?"

"Yes, dad and I made that for her. And dad made the chair for you. He did all the carving himself. I helped but not much."

"Jethro this is perfect. The colors, the bed, everything is perfect. How in the world did you remember the colors I wanted? And the wall colors downstairs and bathroom? Even the couch is the one I loved at Crate and Barrel. It's all just so perfect. Thank you so much."

"You're welcome. I remembered what you liked because believe it or not sometimes I do listen when you talk. Well, when you talk about stuff I'm interested in anyway. You know like paint and tile and baby furniture and couches."

Allison laughed with him and wrapped her arms around his waist. It felt like she had truly come home to the home she so desperately wanted for her child. And to the man she had fallen in love with almost from the first kiss. For the first time since she saw the plus sign in the blue stick, she felt at peace and confident that her life was going to be alright. Maybe even better than alright. Maybe even wonderful.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 7**

**3 MONTHS LATER**

"Jethro. Jethro."

Someone was shoving him and he couldn't figure out why. Suddenly it was very bright and he was very cold. He had only been asleep for about two hours but he felt like he had been drugged he was so groggy.

"Dammit Jethro, wake up!"

"What, what is it?"

Jethro sat up in bed, almost awake and realized it was his wife shoving him, the lights in the bedroom were blazing and the blanket was thrown off him. No wonder he was cold.

"It's time to go. My water broke. Come on Marine, get moving."

"Well finally. I didn't think this little bugger was ever coming. Give me two minutes."

Allison sat on the side of bed watching her husband of two months pull on his jeans, sweatshirt, socks and boots. She smiled at him so frantic and nervous. Then another labor pain hit and she wasn't smiling anymore.

"Okay, come on babe. The bag's downstairs right? Let's go get this done."

Allison let him help her down the stairs and out the front door. Jethro put her bag in the back seat while she got settled in the passenger seat. The drive to the hospital was normally about thirty minutes but since it was almost two o'clock in the morning they made it in less than twenty. Allison was checked in and a nurse examined her and predicted a baby within the next few hours.

"Glad we didn't cut it too close."

"I hated to wake you up after the week you'd had especially since you'd only been home for a few hours but I knew this wasn't going to be another false alarm."

Jethro leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. He felt her grip on his hand tighten as another labor pain hit. They had made the trip to the hospital twice in the past couple of weeks, both times were false alarms. Their baby was a week past due and both mom and dad were overly anxious to finally see their child. They had been assured all was well with the baby; he or she was just not quite ready to make an appearance until tonight.

"Won't be long now. You're doin' great Ali. Try to rest while you can."

Allison closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing. So far she was managing the pain quite well. She was very much ready to have this baby though. It had been an uneventful pregnancy health wise and once they got past the announcement drama and first few months of uncertainty things were great. Allison had felt fine from the beginning and all their tests came back perfect. She had worked up until three weeks ago and now they were both ready to meet their son or daughter.

"Do you want me to call your parents now or wait until the baby is here?"

"Let's wait. They won't go back to bed if we call now. Might as well wait until we have something real to report. You sure you don't mind them coming and staying for a week or so?"

"Are you kidding? The more people here who can help out the better. You will need your mom here if I have to go back to work early. Besides I can use your dad's help with the shelving unit for the nursery."

"Okay. What about Jack?"

"He'll come down when they go home I'm sure. Don't worry about all that right now. Just try and relax while you can."

Jethro leaned down and kissed her. Allison felt another contraction coming on and reached inside her gown to grasp her wedding ring that was on a chain around her neck. As much as she hated to take it off her hands had swollen so much in the last few days she had been afraid to leave it on. She held onto it with one hand and Jethro's hand with the other. When she could relax she found she was holding his ring finger as well as her ring. Jethro noticed too and smiled at her.

"Hard to believe I actually got you to marry me."

"You didn't have too much convincing to do once I saw all the work you'd done on the house. But just so you know, I would have married you anyway."

"Now you tell me!"

They laughed together; something they actually did quite a lot of, much to Jethro's surprise and delight. Allison lay back on the pillow and tried to relax. Jethro sat next to the bed in a pretty comfortable chair as hospital chairs go, and held her hand gently running his thumb back and forth across her knuckles. They both closed their eyes and tried to be patient as they awaited the arrival of their much loved and anticipated child. Jethro actually drifted off to sleep and Allison opened her eyes to find him dozing with his head back against the chair. She never tired of looking at her husband so she took advantage of his stillness to study his handsome face. She knew he was exhausted after the terrible case he and his team had finished this week. But no matter how tired he looked he was still the best looking man she knew. She wouldn't trade him for anyone. Her mind drifted back to the day he proposed for the second, and final time.

_It was a warm Saturday afternoon and Jethro and Allison were driving home from a baby shower Allison's office staff had given her. All the people she worked with and their spouses were there and they had a wonderful time opening gifts and enjoying a delicious catered lunch. Now they had even more great baby gadgets, clothes, blankets and all manner baby loot. It was such a nice day, Jethro drove down to the marina where his boat was docked and they walked along the water for a while. After a short walk Jethro led her to quiet, secluded spot with a picnic table. They sat and looked out at the water and just enjoyed being together._

_Since Allison had returned from Boston to the newly remodeled house, she had been living almost full time with Jethro. Her apartment lease was up in three weeks and she was wondering about renewing. It seemed ridiculous to do so but they had not talked about her moving in-not officially anyway-so she was hesitant to bring it up. She and Jethro were getting along very well and they were both happy with her being in the house. She thought she would bring it up when they got home later that day. While Allison was secretly worrying about her lease, Jethro had already made up his mind she was going to be living with him and wouldn't need the apartment. There was no way he was going to let her stay some place else when she was having the baby in just two short months. He had a plan and this walk had provided just exactly the scene he needed to put that plan into action._

_Allison leaned into Jethro and rested her head on his shoulder. She was tired and would need to go home pretty soon but it was so lovely in this spot she hated to leave. Jethro had his arm around her holding her close. His other hand slipped in to his jacket pocket and closed around the ring box he was getting tired of hiding and carrying around. He slowly pulled it out and turned his head to kiss Ali on the temple._

"_Hey, you awake?"_

_Allison mumbled, "Just barely. It's such a gorgeous day. I'm glad you thought of coming here."_

"_Do you think you could wake up enough to answer an important question?"_

_Allison straightened up and looked at him wondering what was going on. _

"_Sure, what's the question?"_

"_Will you marry me?"_

_Jethro held out the ring box, lid open exposing an exquisite diamond in a wide platinum setting. Allison gasped and covered her mouth with both hands. It was without a doubt the most beautiful ring she had ever seen….and she had done some shopping. _

"_Oh my god, Jethro that is the most fabulous thing I've ever seen!"_

_Jethro turned the ring box around and pretended to study it as if for the first time. He cocked his head to one side and then the other and finally looked back at Allison with his trademark smirk firmly in place._

"_Yeah, it is pretty but you didn't answer my question. Will you do me the honor of wearing this fabulous thing and being my wife?"_

"_Yes, a thousand times yes!"_

"_What about without the fabulous thing?"_

"_Still yes. Even with a cigar band or a Cracker Jack ring or no ring at all I'd marry you."_

"_So, should I just take this back or…"_

"_Don't you even think about it, mister."_

_Jethro took the ring out of it's cushiony nest and slipped it on her finger as he kissed her for all he was worth. He stole her breath away with that kiss and ever since then life had been nearly perfect for both of them. _

Allison was rudely and painfully pulled from her daydream and Jethro from his brief nap by another, much stronger contraction.

"I think this baby means business this time."

"Finally."

Jethro knew enough to signal for the nurse and after she checked Allison she told them the baby was definitely on its way. Once the baby decided to make an appearance things moved along quickly and just forty-five minutes later Jethro was handed a pair of scissors and asked to cut the umbilical cord. The doctor handed him the baby and Jethro got his first good look at his son. Tears immediately filled his eyes as he looked at the squalling, red, wrinkled baby. He could barely breathe he was so overwhelmed to finally hold his child. It seemed like forever but in just a few seconds he turned to Allison and laid the baby on her chest.

"It's a boy. Ali we have a son." It was barely a whisper but Allison understood.

"Oh my god, he's so small. He's perfect."

The nurse let the parents gush over the baby for a short time before she bundled him up and took him to the bassinette to be cleaned up, weighed and measured. Jethro used a warm cloth to wipe Allison's face then he kissed her sweetly on the mouth.

With his mouth on her ear he whispered, "Thank you."

"He's perfect isn't he? Did you count his fingers and toes?"

"Not yet but I'm sure he's perfect. He had lots of black hair. Maybe he'll be as good looking as his mom."

"Oh Jethro, we have a little boy. I can't believe it. I love you."

The nurse had the baby swaddled and a blue knit cap on his head when she handed him back to his mom.

"He's a beautiful little boy. He weighs eight pounds, two ounces and he is twenty-one inches long. He looks and sounds perfect. You three get acquainted and we'll be back to check on you in a little while."

"Thank you."

Allison couldn't take her eyes off her son. Jethro stood by the bed with one hand on Allison's head and the other on the baby's chest. He was overcome with the feeling of déjà vu and couldn't get the image of the newborn Kelly in Shannon's arms all those years ago out of his head. Once again he felt the overpowering sense of responsibility that comes with being a parent. He silently prayed he'd be able to keep this family safe for a very long time.

Nathan and his parents spent the whole day getting to know each other and the next afternoon they took him home. Allison and Jethro were thrilled with their son and took turns holding him almost constantly. Jethro began to wonder if the baby would ever sleep in a bed if they didn't put him down pretty soon. Allison proved a very adept mom and soon had the feeding and changing down pat. From the beginning, Nathan was a good sleeper and allowed him parents to have three hours at a time even the first few days.

Jethro's team came to visit when Nathan was four days old and Allison's parents arrived a week later. It was good they were there because Jethro's team was getting slammed with cases and he was needed back on the job.

"I don't want to leave but we've got two murder cases at once and they need help."

"I understand. It's fine, Jethro. My mom can help in the night and we'll be fine. We knew this could happen. Please don't worry about it. I want you to concentrate on the job and be safe."

The next morning before he left for the Navy Yard Jethro sat in the rocker with Nathan and gave him a bottle. He was so much in love with his son it was hard for him to think of being away even for the day. He wondered how he had ever been able to leave Kelly when she was a baby and be gone for weeks and months at a time. He decided he was too old for that now and vowed he would do his very best to be home every night for Nathan.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 8**

**6 Months Later**

Allison and Jethro had found a wonderful nanny for Nathan so he stayed home with Mrs. Green while his mom and dad were at work. Mrs. Green was a grandmother twelve times over and an expert at caring for sweet, beautiful babies like Nathan. She thought he was the cutest baby she had ever seen outside her own family. Nathan had his mom's black hair and his father's blue eyes. He was a sweet natured baby who seldom cried or fussed unless he was wet or hungry. He was hitting all his developmental milestones on time and his mom and dad loved him more every day.

As far as Nathan was concerned life in the Gibbs household was perfect. He had loving parents, plenty to eat, lots of toys and a nanny who loved him like her own grandson. Unfortunately, for his parents things were not so perfect. Something was wrong in their marriage but they either didn't see it or just didn't want to face it. Jethro was spending much too much time at work and Allison was less and less interested in him coming home. Nathan of course didn't know his parents were barely speaking to each other because they continued to love him and attend to his needs and wants. He might have noticed his daddy wasn't always there at night when he got a bath and went to bed but of course he couldn't tell his daddy he missed him. Maybe Nathan realized his mom wasn't singing to him as much as she used to but he had no way to let her know he liked it better when she sang to him while they were rocking. Most importantly, his parents didn't know he could hear them when they said mean things to each other and sometimes even yelled at each other. He could hear his daddy slamming the door and stomping down the stairs to sleep on the couch and he heard his mom crying herself to sleep. He didn't know what it all meant but he heard it and somewhere in his little boy brain he didn't like it.

When Nathan was nine months old Allison confronted Jethro and told him they needed to go to marriage counseling. Jethro refused.

When Nathan was eleven months old Allison asked again and Jethro refused again so Allison told him she was leaving. Jethro panicked when she said that and agreed to talk to someone. He promised to change things even though he really had no idea what things needed changing. He was desperate not to lose Nathan and would do whatever she wanted him to do. Or so he said. Allison told him she knew she needed to do her part and told him she had been seeing a therapist for the last two months. She said it was helping some but she really needed him to participate.

"Jethro, things have to change. Not just you; me too. We don't communicate anymore and if we don't get this worked out we won't survive together. I don't want that. I don't want to lose you."

"Then don't threaten to take my son and leave me." Jethro was scared and that usually presented itself as angry. He tried not to yell because even though they were in the basement and Nathan was upstairs he didn't want his son to hear him yelling.

"First of all, Nathan is OUR son. Secondly, it is not just a threat; I am going to leave if you do not go to marriage counseling with me. That is if you want to stay married. If you don't then of course, don't bother."

"Okay, let's both calm down. I want to stay married. I want to fix whatever the hell is broken. I just don't know what it is! Do you?"

Allison took a deep breath and as he suggested, tried to calm down. She was at the end of her rope and barely hanging onto the knot at the end. In truth, she was not really sure what was wrong. She just knew that Jethro was slowly shutting her out and she was just as surely pulling away from him.

"No, I don't know what is really wrong with us. We don't talk anymore, you are gone too much, I'm too tired all the time. I'm afraid of losing you and I seem to be either pushing you away or holding too tight or something. I feel you shutting down or shutting me out or something. Tell me what I'm doing that you don't like. Please, Jethro, just tell me what you want, tell me what to do."

Jethro looked at his wife standing against his work bench, fighting back tears and he wanted to cry. She was so beautiful but tonight she looked tired and almost as scared as he felt. In typical Gibbs fashion, Jethro had completely forgotten Allison's birthday and then, without calling, had worked all night on their first anniversary. She told him it didn't matter; it was okay, but really what woman would think those two transgressions were okay? He worked too much and as was his habit in a relationship, he withheld and minimized and avoided until the other person had had enough. In this case, Allison was fighting for them and he wasn't used to that. In the past when he got to this point in a relationship the other person usually just packed up and left. Thank god, she hadn't done that because that would have meant Nathan was gone and Jethro could not have survived that. Jethro adored his son and he knew all this tension and fighting in the house wasn't good for him. In his rational moments he tried not to yell because he knew Nathan could hear it and even though he was just a baby it was bad for him. He knew he was gone too much and leaving too much of Nathan's care on Allison's shoulders. She worked full time, had a stressful job and was a first time parent and he wasn't being much help.

"There isn't anything you're doing wrong Ali. I think it's me. Maybe I don't know how to be with someone long term. Maybe I can't be a husband or at least the husband you should have. I want to be what you need but maybe I can't."

Allison looked at Jethro, the man she loved more than her own life, the man she thought could walk through fire, and he sounded so defeated she couldn't believe what she was hearing. She had never known Jethro to doubt himself so thoroughly and she was determined to do whatever it took to save them. She reached for his hand and raised it to her lips kissing his palm. Then she wrapped her arms around his waist, laid her head on his chest, and held onto him with all her might. Whatever was wrong they would fix it. When she felt Jethro wrap his arms around her and really hold her for the first time in weeks the tears she'd fought so hard to keep at bay finally escaped and rolled down her face to dampen his shirt. They stayed in that embrace and cried together for a long time that night.

When Allison relaxed her hold on him and stepped back just a little bit so she could see him, Jethro wiped her tears with his thumbs and kissed her. This was the closest they had been to intimacy in what seemed like forever.

"Jethro, you're the best man I know. You're a good husband and I don't believe there is anything you can't do if you want to. Our problems aren't because of some failure on your part. They are simply the result of the two of us not working together lately. No you have not been with someone long term in many years but I don't think that means you can't do it. Please don't compare your previous marriages to us. I'm not Diane or Stephanie and you're not the same person you were when you married them."

"I am the common denominator though you have to admit that."

"I don't care about that. I love you. Do you love me? Do you still want to be with me and make a family with me?"

Without hesitation Jethro answered, "Yes. I love you. Yes, I want us to be together as a family. I still want that Ali, but I seem to be losing it anyway."

"Then promise me you won't give up on us. Promise me you will fight just as hard for us to stay together as you did to get me to marry you."

Jethro smiled at her and pulled her back into his arms. As much as he didn't want to talk about his personal business to a stranger he knew he'd have to do it if he was serious about them staying together. "Okay. Maybe some marriage counseling will help. I'll go. Will you tell me what the counselor has told you?"

"She has suggested we need to make time for ourselves as a couple. She thinks perhaps we need to have 'date night' once a week. And make more of an effort to spend time with Nathan."

"Date night sounds good to me. I know I haven't been home much and I've left too much of Nathan's care to you. I'll fix that, I promise."

"And I know that I have neglected you, Jethro. I can think of several times when you were home and wanted to spend time together and I said I was too tired. Because of that, I've cut back on my schedule and will only be working four days a week starting next week."

"Are you serious? Ali, this is not your fault you know."

"I know that but I want to spend more time at home and more time with Nathan and I can do this. I may do some paperwork or research from home but I will be home on Mondays from now on. Maybe we can have some long weekends if you can sneak away."

"Count on it."

Jethro ran his fingers in her hair brushing it back from her face. It had been a long time since they had made love and he missed his wife. He leaned down and kissed her pulling her close. Allison responded to his kiss with all the emotion she had been keeping bottled up for so long. Soon hands were roaming and clothes were hitting the floor and by the time they slowed down to take a breath they needed to get somewhere besides the basement.

"Let's take this upstairs. I need to be with you. I want to remind you how much I love you, Jethro."

"I'm right behind you. Let me lock up and I'll be there."

Jethro locked up the house and when he got upstairs he checked on Nathan, covering him with a light blanket and kissing him on the head. He vowed things would change and he would not only be a better husband he would also be a better dad.

Allison was waiting for him in their bed and that night they started the sometimes difficult journey back to each other. They couldn't seem to get enough of each other and their lovemaking went on well into the night. Luckily for them, Nathan slept through the night. Maybe he knew his mom and dad needed some alone time.

After that night things gradually got better in the Gibbs household. Jethro kept his promise and started seeing the same therapist Allison had been seeing for the past two months. He went alone the first few times and after he learned Dr. Murray was married to a retired Marine he figured he could trust her. She was about his age and took a common sense approach to her work with clients. Jethro liked her and found her easy to talk to. He told her about Shannon and Kelly and about his other marriages all of which he characterized as failures on his part.

"Why did you marry the three women you later divorced?"

Jethro had given this very question a lot of thought over the years and had come up with a variety of answers; none of which really satisfied him.

"I've often wondered that myself. I thought I loved them and maybe in a way I did. It seemed like the thing to do at the time and I don't mean that in a flippant way. We dated, we slept together, we got along so we got married. Sort of the natural progression as I saw it at the time."

"Do you think there's some other, deeper reason?"

"You mean was I trying to replace Shannon?"

"Yes."

"If I was I did a damn poor job of it. None of those women could hold a candle to Shannon. They weren't bad people but they were nothing like her."

They were quiet for a few minutes. Jethro was looking off into space and Dr. Murray sensed he had something else to say on the subject.

"I was nothing like the young, cocky Marine Shannon fell in love with either. I was already so wary and cold inside that if a woman like Shannon had come along she wouldn't have given me the time of day."

"What do you think Shannon liked about you?"

He looked at Dr. Murray and frowned. He'd never given that much thought. It was almost embarrassing to think about.

As if she had read his mind, Dr. Murray said, "Remember, Jethro, I've heard it all before. Try to be as honest as you can. I'm sure Shannon told you what she liked about you."

"She said she liked my eyes." Jethro closed his eyes and took some deep breaths. He hadn't thought about his time with Shannon in a while and it was hard. "She said I made her laugh because I was so serious sometimes. She said she felt safe with me. She said I was a good kisser and we were good for each other."

By the time he finished speaking his voice was just a whisper and there were tears in his eyes.

"What does this have to do with me and Allison?"

"Maybe nothing but I wanted you to remember some good things about yourself. Some things that made a very special woman love you. Jethro, you have had a lot of experiences of women saying they love you, saying they would stand by you and then not doing what they promised. You think those things are your fault. I'm trying to show you that you are not the only one to blame. Certainly you played a part in those situations but you were not alone in them. And more importantly I'm trying to show you that you are capable of loving someone and of having them love you. I think for a long time you looked for someone who would love you for a little while and then leave you. I don't think you really wanted to be happy because you didn't think you deserved it."

"I never understood how Shannon could love me like she did but I was so crazy about her that I believed her. God, we were so young then. So blindly in love it amazes me to think about it now. When Kelly was born I didn't have a clue. Shannon either really. We were just operating on love and instinct. She was a great mom from day one. That baby, she just overpowered me and I've never really been the same. I was blown away that another person loved me like that. When they were gone I wanted to die. Part of me did die and I don't really know how I managed to keep breathing because it seemed so useless. I was sure I would never be okay and, you know, I'm not sure I am."

"The fact that you can question that tells me you are okay. You survived. You haven't escaped life unscathed but you have survived. I think you're right, you were never going to find another love like Shannon. In many ways you grew up together and that kind of love is a one time gift. The love of a child is only ever duplicated by the love of another child. I imagine you will feel that love from Nathan just as you did from Kelly. I want you to think about the love you say you feel for Allison. How is it different or the same as the love you had for Shannon or any of your other wives for that matter?"

Dr. Murray looked at her client and saw he was emotionally drained. She knew he had had a long week and this session had been tough for him. Together, she and Jethro had covered some very difficult topics over the previous few weeks. He was a tough nut to crack and held himself to an almost impossibly high standard. It was obvious he had endured a tremendous amount of emotional pain in his life and had dealt constructively with very little of it. She wanted to help him do that so he could be the husband and father he wanted to be. And, she wanted him to find the happiness he deserved.

"Jethro, you did some good, tough work tonight. Thank you for being so open to this process and so honest. I know this is not what you want to be doing. I want to see you alone one more time then let's get you and Allison here together for a few sessions. Sound okay to you?"

"Sure. Is this going to help me keep my family together?"

"I hope so but ultimately that's up to you and Allison. Do you think things are any better since you've been coming to see me?"

"Yes. But you know, Doc things can get better for a while and then they seem to go sideways. I feel like I'm always just waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"What is that proverbial 'other shoe' to you Jethro?"

"Ali leaving me."

"So you don't trust that she intends to be with you for the long haul?"

"No one ever has."

There was a longer than usual silence in the room as Dr. Murray thought about her response. The resignation she saw on Jethro's face and heard in his voice threatened her professional resolve to never get too attached to her clients.

"And I can't guarantee this marriage will last but from what I've seen your wife has no intention of leaving you. You may have to learn to trust her just as you had to learn to trust your buddies in the Corps and your team at NCIS. Trust is a two way street Jethro, you know that. You and Allison have some work to do but don't get discouraged. I think you're making good progress."

"If you say so. I do love her you know. I don't want to lose her."

"Then don't."

For the next week Jethro did as Dr. Murray had asked. He thought about the love he felt for Allison and how it compared to how he'd felt about his other wives including Shannon. He decided it wasn't much like how he'd felt for Shannon. That had been a knock-you-down, love at first sight kind of thing. Once he convinced her to sit with him on the train ride from Stillwater to DC he was hooked and so was she. He loved everything about her from the first time she called him Gibbs to the way she brushed her teeth to the way she came alive whenever they made love. He never once doubted anything she said to him including that she would love him forever. Jethro knew from the moment he accepted she was gone that he would never again feel like that about another woman and so far he was right.

It had taken him years and years to accept the idea of loving another woman. Once he married again he realized even though he might have thought he was in love he really wasn't; at least not in his definition. He had spent most of his adult life trying to recapture the feeling he'd had with Shannon and so far, including Allison, he had not done so. What he was now able to understand was that there are different kinds of love even between husband and wife and it was okay to move on to another kind of love with a woman. He no longer expected or even wanted to feel like he did when he was nineteen and truly clueless about how to love a woman. He liked to believe his concept of love and marriage had finally matured in proportion to his age.

So, the question remained as he headed back to Dr. Murray's office on Thursday night; how could he describe the love he felt for his current wife?

"How was your week, Jethro?"

"Pretty quiet at work but Nathan is cutting a tooth so things are not so quiet at home."

"Oh yes, I remember those days well. Luckily it doesn't last long. Can you talk to me a bit about how you feel about Allison and your marriage?

"I think it's getting smoother. Better I'd say."

"That's what you think but I want to know how you're feeling about it. How you feel about it deep down."

"I know. That's a lot harder."

"Of course it is. But much more important than what you think most of the time. You follow your gut most of the time don't you, on a case?"

"I do."

"It's more like that than what your head says."

Jethro sat and looked out the window for a while. When he started speaking he was still looking out the window, somehow that made it easier.

"I love Allison. I like the way I feel when she's around. I respect her for the work she does and how she stands up for people who don't always have a voice. I miss her when she's not around. That's a difference between her and my previous wives. I almost never missed them when they weren't home. Now, when I come home if Allison isn't there I miss her. She doesn't press me to talk about things I'm not ready to talk about."

Jethro paused and it occurred to him how easily he could talk about how he felt about his wife. This was new territory for him and he found he liked it.

"I like having her stuff around the house and the way she seems to make things easier. I don't know how to explain that really. Maybe I mean she helps me stay calm and that seems to make life smoother. I feel calmer inside with her there. I trust her. I like the way she smells and the way she moves and I like having her like me. I'm glad she's the mother of my son; I feel really good about that."

"That's an impressive list. Have you shared those things with Allison?"

"Some of them. I could probably do a better job of that."

"I think she'd like that; any woman would. What about what you don't like about her?"

Jethro laughed. "I bet she had a long list for you if you asked her the same question."

"Not nearly as long as the list for the previous question."

Jethro smiled to himself. That was good to hear. He had to think about what to say because there wasn't anything he really didn't like about Allison.

"You know, I can't really think of anything. I mean she puts her cold feet on me and she takes up a lot more of the bed than a woman her size should but I can't really say I don't like that. She's kinda messy in the bathroom. I think she works too hard but so do I. I guess there isn't anything I would say I don't like about her. I mean she's not perfect but I'm so far from that it isn't even funny so…."

"Is this a difference in comparison to your other marriages?"

"Oh yeah. I could give you a long list of things I didn't like about those three ladies."

Jethro looked at Dr. Murray and saw her smiling at him. He wondered about that for a moment until he realized what he'd just said.

"You're trying to show me that Allison and I are different. That we don't have to end up like my other marriages. Right?"

"I just ask the questions, Jethro. You have the answers and draw the conclusions. But, yes, I would say you have realized what I was hoping you would. As you said last time, you are a different man now than you were when you married any of those other women. You learned from your mistakes."

"Took me long enough."

Dr. Murray knew there was a risk in asking her next question but she knew if this couple was to stay together in the long run they had to face the hard fact that until he knew she was pregnant, Jethro was prepared to leave Allison for another woman.

"There is one more thing I'd like us to cover before I see you and Allison together. If it were not for Nathan would you and Allison be together?"

Jethro sighed. He had figured this was going to come up but he still hated it.

"No."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Not particularly but I will. Before she told me she was pregnant, I was ready to break up with Allison because I had feelings for another woman. I learned those feelings were returned and I wanted to explore that possibility. I had no idea Allison was really serious about us and of course, no idea she was pregnant. That being said, once I knew she was having my child I ended the situation with the other woman and was committed to Allison. And our child. She knows all this by the way."

"You feel confident the two of you have accepted this part of your relationship?"

"Absolutely. I have no interest in any other woman. I love Allison and I want to stay married to her. We may have come to this place in a round about way but we're here now and I'm glad. I like being married to Allison. I love Nathan and I expect us to raise him together for a long time. Forever."

At home things were going much better between Jethro and Allison. Date night was a big success. They didn't make it out of the house every week but at least every other. When they did go out for dinner or a long walk on the Mall, Abby was the trusted babysitter. It had taken her quite a while to warm up to Allison but because she loved Gibbs she had made the effort and now she and Allison were actually friends. Abby loved Nathan and she thought he was the cutest baby on the planet. She spoiled him mightily but his mom and dad didn't mind.

Allison loved being home on Mondays and Jethro often went home for lunch or came home early on those days. They were both making the effort to strengthen their bond and communicate better with one another. Their sex life was definitely back to where it had been before Nathan came along. Sometimes, if Nathan napped at the right time, those Monday lunches turned into what DiNozzo referred to as a "nooner". Jethro couldn't have been happier with his wife's new work schedule and with his life in general.

Marriage counseling had not been nearly as painful as Jethro had imagined it to be and after just three sessions together, Dr. Murray suggested they didn't really need her help anymore.

"I think you two have a very solid foundation and having talked to you both I believe you are equally committed to your marriage. Nathan is lucky to have you both as parents. While he may have been the initial reason you stayed together I believe you have both moved beyond that in your relationship and I don't think you are together only because of your son. If that were the case I would be very concerned for you in the long run but I don't believe that to be true. I don't discount that you may struggle from time to time but that is to be expected and should not be a cause for alarm. I am here and willing to talk anytime. Trust each other and yourselves and I think you will be fine."

Jethro and Allison thanked Dr. Murray for her help. They both knew they had benefited from having someone listen to them and help them focus on what they knew they wanted but were unsure how to accomplish.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 9**

Nathan was a delightful little boy and his parents and grandparents doted on him. At the same time he was growing up with limits and discipline that both him parents agreed upon. He had mostly skipped over walking and instead he ran almost everywhere he went. He had thick black hair like his mom and his daddy's striking blue eyes. Nathan loved the water and trucks and ice cream. And, of course he loved his mom and dad. Jethro made it a point to be home at night in time for supper most nights and if he had to gone late he always called and told Nathan goodnight.

For the next year things were wonderful for the Gibbs family. When Nathan turned two they celebrated with a family birthday party and Jackson and Allison's parents all came for the long weekend. Gibbs' team came for the picnic in the back yard and Nathan was of course the center of attention. Allison had not spent a great deal of time with Jethro's team even after they married mostly due to work conflicts and the fact that Jethro preferred, even now, to keep his personal life separate from his work. Still, his team was really part of his extended family and they all loved Nathan. They had come to accept Allison once they saw how much happier their boss was in the last couple of years. Allison enjoyed having everyone at the house and was the perfect hostess setting everyone at ease and letting them all enjoy the day.

That night after everyone was gone, the house put back in order and Nathan and Jackson were both sound asleep, Jethro closed their bedroom door and he and Allison got ready for bed. Snuggling together Jethro kissed her and told her what a great job she had done with the party.

"Today was a lot of fun. You did a great job with the food and I think everyone had a good time."

"It was fun wasn't it. Nathan had a blast with Tony and Tim. I'm glad my parents were here too. And Jack of course. We should have them here more often."

"We can't afford to feed DiNozzo very often. Did you see that piece of cake he ate?"

"He still eats like he's in college."

Jethro rolled onto his side and propped his head up with hand. His other hand go busy exploring under Allison's top. He leaned down and kissed her thoroughly then looked at her and asked something that had been on his mind for weeks.

"Ali, do you want another child?"

Allison drew back and looked at him surprised by the question. She loved Nathan with all her heart and loved being a mom but Nathan was just now two and she wasn't sure she was ready to do the baby thing all over again.

"Do you mean in nine months or sometime a little farther into the future? Are you thinking of starting one tonight?"

"I'm definitely thinking of doing what it takes to start one tonight but I meant in the future. You know when Nate's four or so."

"In that case, yes. I'd love to have another child. In about two years. You?"

"Yes. You're such a great mom and it seems to suit you. I think another one would be fun."

"Fun? Yes it would be. I love you Jethro."

That was the end of the conversation for a while. She didn't even let Jethro respond to her declaration. She rolled on top of him and kissed him until he thought he'd pass out. Then they practiced the baby making routine for a few hours until they fell dead asleep, happy that Jackson would be up early with Nathan.

Allison and Jethro settled into a happy, normal family life and both felt lucky to have achieved the level of satisfaction they had in their lives. From where they started to where they were now was night and day different. Their first several meetings had been acrimonious and full of sharp words that neither would consider speaking to the other these days. Both still worked long stressful hours but also managed to have a home life that recharged their batteries each day. Nathan was a joy to his parents and they made sure to enjoy him even when he was driving them crazy. Jethro especially, knew how quickly these toddler days would pass and he didn't want to miss anything with Nathan. He had missed too much with Kelly and then he missed it all.

In fact things were so good Jethro began to worry that something was coming to mess that up. He was a firm believer that when things seemed to be going perfectly something invariably came along and blew life all to hell. He was getting that feeling now and unfortunately, he was right.

One late summer night as they were relaxing on the deck enjoying the cooling evening Allison told Jethro something that would eventually have a huge impact on their lives.

"I think someone is following me. The husband of a client."

"What? When did this start and why am I just now hearing about it?"

"Calm down. I wasn't sure until yesterday and you're hearing about it as soon as I had something to tell you."

Jethro stood up and walked to the edge of the deck then turned around to face his wife. For maybe the first time since he'd know her, Allison looked scared. That had the dual effect of softening his anger and ramping up his fear level. He went back to his chair, pulled it around in front of her and sat down taking her hands in his.

"Tell me what's going on."

Allison fought back her tears. She was scared but having Jethro so in tune with her feelings was reassuring. She had hesitated to bring this to him because she was afraid of how he would react. She didn't want him going off in a fit of anger and getting himself hurt or in trouble.

"You remember the client I told you about whose husband works for the Secret Service? Well, we were in court last week and my client was awarded sole custody of their daughter and the father has only supervised visitation. Naturally he was furious. He had to be restrained by his attorney and when we got outside he threatened his ex-wife and then me. I didn't think much of it; he's a loudmouth jerk and has been very vocal throughout this whole ordeal. He has threatened her many times in the past but never did anything. Now I'm sure he's following me."

As a father, Jethro wondered how he'd react if someone said he could only see Nathan under supervision. He didn't think he'd take that very well.

"What did this guy do to get that sort of ruling against him?"

"He molested his daughter. Suffice to say it was enough that he's facing criminal charges as well. He's already been out of the house for three months because of a child welfare and police investigation. He was uncooperative with them from the start. He's a real jerk but mostly just mouthy until now."

"Tell me what you've seen."

"I've been getting hang ups on my cell phone. I don't know how he got the number but I'm sure it's him. On my work phone too. I've seen him parked across the street from our office and he's followed me to lunch twice. I've talked to our office people and they know to be on the lookout for him. On Monday when Cheryl and I walked down the street for lunch he followed us but on the other side of the street. It's starting to creep me out. What should I do?"

"Have you reported him to the cops yet?"

"I did yesterday. Of course he hasn't approached me or threatened me directly so they can't do anything. You know how it works."

"Yeah, I do. Do you think he's dangerous, Ali?"

"Only because his ex just took their daughter and moved to Colorado. He has no one else to focus on here but me. He blames me for all this because until his wife contacted our office she had no legal representation. She couldn't afford an attorney on her own so we took her on as pro bono client."

Jethro was seething inside but tried not to let Allison see it. He knew there wasn't much to be done legally and he couldn't do what he was thinking about and risk his career no matter how much he wanted to. Right now he was concerned about Ali and helping her feel safe.

"Hey, you know I won't let anything happen to you. We'll figure this out. Where does this guy live?"

"Jethro you absolutely cannot go after him!"

"I know. But you can't expect me to do nothing at all."

"Just be careful, Jethro. This man has lost everything, his family, his job and in the near future maybe his freedom."

"You are the one who needs to be careful, Ali. Look, maybe you need to take some time off or something."

"I thought of that but we're so busy right now and I have two trials coming up. I'll be careful, I promise. I won't go out of the office alone. I just wanted you to know what's going on. I don't honestly think he'll do anything."

Jethro stood up and reached for her hand. "Come on, let's go in and go to bed. We can talk about this again tomorrow if you want. I'll figure something out to give this guy a warning."

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Allison wrapped herself around Jethro and returned his kiss. She always felt safe in his arms and tonight was no different.

"I love you, Jethro. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Don't plan on finding out anytime soon. You're stuck with me."

"Good."

Later, lying awake with his wife tucked in safely at his side, Jethro stared at the ceiling and thought about Ali's unnamed stalker. She hadn't told him the man's name because she wasn't supposed to talk about clients but in this case he was going to insist. Tomorrow. Tonight had been about making sure she felt safe and loved. That, at least was something Jethro _could_ do; stopping the guy was another thing. He'd figure out something he thought as the night wore on and sleep refused to come. He wouldn't lose another wife that was a certainty. How to make sure it didn't happen was still up in the air but he'd figure it out.

The next morning Allison left a file on the bed when she went downstairs for breakfast. Jethro was in the shower and she knew he'd understand and read the file before giving it to her when he came down. While she helped Nathan with his breakfast and marveled at what a sweet, handsome boy he was, she thought about last night. Jethro had been gentle and especially attentive to her when they made love and she knew he had been trying to reassure her she was safe. As usual, he didn't need words to communicate to her how he was feeling and what he wanted her to know.

Jethro read the file and memorized the man's name and address. He had decided he would very discreetly pay the man a visit as soon a possible. The guy had screwed up his own life and Jethro was determined he wouldn't screw up theirs. Hopefully the guy would be locked up pretty soon anyway and the whole thing would blow over.

"Hey, you left this upstairs." He handed Allison the file as he leaned down to kiss Nathan on the head.

"Good morning little man. How's my boy today?"

"Good morning daddy. I'm having cereal."

"I see that. Is that pretty good stuff?"

"Cheerios. Good stuff."

Jethro turned his attention to Nathan's mom and gave her a proper good morning kiss.

"You look very nice today."

"I have court this morning. Pays to look good for this judge. Thank you for last night. You took my mind completely off my worries."

"That was my intention. One of them anyway. Love you, Ali and I want you to know I'll always protect you."

"I do know that and I love you back. Can you stay until Mrs. Green gets here?"

"Sure. Call me if you have any trouble today. I'll be checking on things."

"Don't tell me. I can't hear about this. Be safe today."

Jethro didn't get to check on the man that day or for the next three days either as his team was working a double murder case that kept him away from home most of the week. By the time Friday rolled around all Jethro wanted to do was go home to his family and hibernate for two days. Allison had assured him throughout the week that she had not seen the man since telling him about the problem. On Friday afternoon she found out the reason was he had been arrested on Tuesday and locked up until Friday morning when he posted bail and was released.

Jethro, Allison and Nathan went to their cabin in the mountains for the weekend and stayed until Monday evening. They had a wonderful time being outdoors, fishing and just spending quiet time together. Nathan loved being outside and playing in the dirt. They took long walks in the woods and Jethro and Allison spent a lot of quality time together after Nathan fell asleep, exhausted by all his playing and the fresh air. They sat outside and looked at the stars they could never see in DC.

"Could you ever have imagined we would be together like this when we first met?"

"You mean when you were trying to ruin my career? No, I never even thought about giving you the time of day."

"But there was something there wasn't there? Something between us even then. I don't know what it was except that I thought you were very sexy."

"Really? Yes, there was something about you I liked even while you were trying to destroy me. I'm sure glad you failed at that by the way."

"I am too. You know I am sorry about that don't you? I mean I would never do anything to hurt you now of course."

"I know, I'm just messing with you. We've come a long way Ali and I do love you. I want you to know that no matter what that won't change."

"I love you too and just that much."

On Monday morning Jethro and Allison were sitting on the porch with their coffee while Nathan played with his trucks in the grass outside. It was a beautiful summer morning nice and cool with a slight breeze from the mountains. Jethro thought he liked it here as much as at the beach. Allison reached for his hand and linked her fingers with his.

"I talked to Ziva last week."

Jethro felt his breath catch in his throat and he thought maybe he'd misunderstood her. He looked over and she was looking at Nathan pushing a dump truck through a tunnel made of an old minnow bucket.

"What?"

"I said I talked to Ziva last week. I called her about my client. I wanted to know if she knew him and if so if she thought he was dangerous."

Jethro wasn't surprised when he thought about that for a second. He had decided to do the same thing but had not had time because of the case he was working on all week.

"What'd she say?"

"She only knew him by name; she'd never met him. She's going to ask around, discreetly of course and get back to us. He's not there now; hasn't been since this all started several months ago. You don't mind that I called her do you?"

"No, of course not. I was going to do it myself but with the case I just didn't get to it. I'm glad you did."

"She said to tell you hello."

They were quiet for a while. The only sounds were the rustle of the trees and Nathan's truck sounds. Jethro felt like he should say something but he didn't know what it would be. He hadn't thought about Ziva in a long time until Allison said her client's crazy husband worked for the Secret Service. He watched his son crashing cars together in the summer sun and wondered how he felt about Ziva now. He wondered if she was happy; if she had found someone to love. He had kept his promise to her. The one he'd made that awful night so long ago. He was happy and he was a good husband and father. He hoped she'd been about to keep her promise to be happy.

"Jethro, it's alright. That was a long time ago and I know we're good. Ziva is a good person, a friend I hope and after I explained what was going on she wanted to help. I reached out to her because I knew I could trust her."

"You're right, you can trust her. In fact, I'd be careful if I was Mr. Cole. Ziva is liable to do what I want to do."

"Yes, I thought of that."

When he looked at her Allison had a smirk of her own on her face and a gleam of something approaching evil in her eyes.

"I just bet you did. Way to go Ali."

All the way home that night Jethro thought about Mr. Cole and what to do about him threatening Allison. Realistically he knew there wasn't much he could do. If he confronted the man it could blow up in his face and there could be ramifications from Allison talking about a case; even with him. He thought that was unlikely but with lawyers involved you just never knew. He didn't want Ziva to get into trouble either but he knew with her skills she could give the dirt bag a good warning and he'd never know what hit him. That sounded good to him but maybe not the best course of action either.

Nothing happened the following week except Allison did see Mr. Cole on the street when she went to her car Thursday evening. He was just standing there watching her building and she saw him watch her drive away. She made sure he didn't follow her. Allison had no idea if he knew where she lived but she wasn't taking any chances. She still used her maiden name professionally so chances were he didn't even know her married name. He certainly would if he got too close and Jethro had to do something. She smiled in spite of the situation when she thought that if he ever heard from her husband, Mr. Cole was unlikely to ever forget the name Jethro Gibbs.

The family spent a quiet weekend at home and Allison began to relax and put Mr. Cole out of her mind. Out of the blue on Saturday afternoon Nathan told his daddy he wanted a puppy. Jethro looked at his son and wondered where that had come from.

"What do you mean you want a puppy?"

Jethro was stretched out on the couch while Nathan played with some blocks and trucks on the floor. Allison was upstairs putting away the clean clothes.

"A puppy to play with. Brandon has a puppy. I want a puppy too. Okay daddy?"

"Well, I don't know Nate. A puppy is a pretty big deal. You have to take it for a walk and play with it and feed it."

"Okay."

Nathan stood up and leaned on his daddy's chest looking at him with big blue eyes full of trust and unadulterated love.

"I want a black puppy like Brandon."

"What kind of puppy does Brandon have?"

Jethro was sure Nathan would not understand that question but he loved having these conversations with his almost three year old.

"He's a Lab puppy. Brandon's mom said he gonna get really big. Let's get one daddy."

Jethro reached down and pulled Nathan onto his chest. Nathan settled on his daddy with his arms on Jethro's chest, chin resting on his arms and his eyes pleading for a Lab puppy.

"Daddy will think about it. And talk to mommy about it. Then we'll decide. Okay?"

"Okay."

Jethro wrapped his arms around his sweet little boy and kissed him on the top of the head.

"Daddy loves you Nathan."

"I love you daddy."

The two Gibbs boys laid there on the couch each thinking about a black Lab puppy. Eventually, Jethro pulled a light cover off the back of the couch, covered them up and they fell fast asleep. That was how Allison found them thirty minutes later. She stood in the doorway for a long time just looking at her boys. She marveled at her good fortune and said a silent prayer of thanks for the blessing of two people she loved and who loved her.

On Monday Jethro reluctantly went to work leaving his wife and son snuggling in the bed. He was glad Allison had this time at home with Nathan but he was just a little bit jealous too. He would have loved to been able to sleep in today. He hated Mondays.

No new cases came in that morning but the team was busy with paperwork and before lunch Gibbs took everyone to the gym for a team workout. Afterwards he sent his three agents out to lunch and he went to visit Ducky. The afternoon drug by slowly so when Allison called at three thirty Jethro was happy to walk outside for some fresh air and to talk to her in private.

"How's your day going?"

"Slowly. No case which is good but not so good. You know what I mean. Anyway, what are you and Nate doing?"

"We've been outside for a while and he took a short nap while I did some paperwork. I have to go into the office for a little bit so I'm taking him with me. I thought we could meet you at Luigi's for an early supper. How's that sound?"

"Sounds like a very good idea. About five thirty?"

"Perfect. See you then. Love you."

"Me too."

Jethro returned to the office much happier than he had left. Life was good he thought and getting better. Allison packed up her briefcase and she and Nathan headed for the car. She didn't notice the late model Toyota that passed by the house as she helped Nathan get settled in his car seat. She smiled at him in the rearview mirror.

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 10**

Jethro returned to the office much happier than he had left. Life was good he thought and getting better. Allison packed up her briefcase and she and Nathan headed for the car. She didn't notice the late model Toyota that passed by the house as she helped Nathan get settled in his car seat. She smiled at him in the rearview mirror.

"Mommy, daddy said I could get a puppy."

"A what?"

"A puppy. A black Lab like Brandon has."

"Daddy said you could have a black Lab puppy? When did daddy say this?"

Allison was trying to concentrate on her driving but her mind was definitely at least partially thinking of ways to slowly torture her husband.

"On the couch. The other day."

"Well, mommy will talk to daddy about it tonight."

"Okay. We going to see daddy?"

"Yes, but first we have to go to mommy's office then we're going to meet daddy for supper."

"And talk about a puppy."

"Sure. Why not?"

Allison had to smile. Jethro had certainly failed to mention anything about a puppy, black Lab or otherwise. She thought about it for a few minutes and decided it wasn't a bad idea. She loved dogs and thought it would be a good for Nathan to grow up with one. She had always had a dog when she was a kid. Why not indeed?"

At five o'clock Jethro headed to the elevator just as his cell phone buzzed at him. He hoped it wasn't a case; his mouth was watering for some good Italian food.

"Yeah, Gibbs."

"It's Ziva."

"Hello."

"Gibbs I have some news for you about the man Allison called me about. I tried to reach her but they said she had just left and I do not have her cell number. So, I called you."

Jethro paused for just an extra second.

"Are you there, Gibbs?"

"Yes, I'm here. Where are you?"

"Leaving my office. Why?"

"I'm meeting Allison and Nathan at Luigis for supper. Why don't you join us and you can tell us both what you have."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I want you to meet Nathan. Unless it would make you uncomfortable."

"No I would like to see you. And your family. But, listen to me first. You need to be very careful of this man, Jethro. I think he may be close to his breaking point. He called a friend at the Secret Service today and the man told me Mr. Cole sounded very depressed. He told his friend good bye and the man felt it was a forever sort of good bye."

"Okay, thanks. We'll talk about it together. Or maybe after dinner since Nathan will be there. But come join us anyway."

"Yes, I will be there as soon as the traffic allows."

Traffic wasn't too terrible this evening as it was mid-summer and lots of lucky people were out of town. Four people whose lives had intersected so profoundly a few short years ago were all headed to the same place on this beautiful summer evening. Their lives were about to intersect again in dramatic and life changing ways.

A few minutes before five thirty Allison found a parking space on the street just down the block from their favorite Italian place. It was a small, family owned restaurant that she and Jethro had been coming to ever since they started dating. The owners, Carlo and Anna, always had a special table for them and they doted on Nathan, bringing him his favorite breadsticks and a special macaroni and cheese Allison was sure they made especially for him. Allison got Nathan out of his car seat and reminded him to hold her hand while they were walking.

As Allison and Nathan started toward the restaurant Jethro was just a block away looking for a parking place. There was a small lot near the restaurant but it was usually full so he intended to take the first empty spot he could find. Parking here was a pain but as far as Jethro was concerned the food made up for the inconvenience. He saw Allison and Nathan on the sidewalk walking in his direction. He watched as Allison leaned down to say something to Nathan and then he saw a man approach them from behind, quickly step around them and stop right in front of Allison.

Jethro's gut began to churn and he desperately looked for a place to park the car. The man was obviously not someone Allison wanted to talk to and she tried to step around him while keeping Nathan close to her. Jethro could see the man was well dressed; obviously not a street person begging. He was gesturing and appeared to be talking loudly as passersbys were turning to look at him. Jethro felt like the world was moving in slow motion but all this observation had taken only a few seconds. When the man reached out and tried to grab Nathan, Jethro threw the car into an alley, punched on his emergency flashers and jumped out. He saw Allison push the man away and pick Nathan up. She tried to turn away and leave but the man grabbed her and pulled her back.

The rage that was about to explode in Jethro was frightening even to him or it would have been if he had time to recognize it. As it was he was running full speed at the man with every intention of doing him great bodily harm. There were a few other people in the vicinity but no one was paying much attention to Allison and the man accosting her. Jethro reached the man as he was trying to grab Nathan away from his mom. He registered that Nathan was crying, Allison was screaming at the man and the man seemed determined to get the child away from Allison.

Jethro slammed into the man and forced him away from his wife and child. The man stumbled and fell back but Jethro was focused on Allison and his son and paid no mind to the man for the moment.

"Are you okay?"

Jethro put his hand on Nathan's back and kissed him on the head.

"Daddy's here, Nate it's okay."

"I'm fine. Jethro, that's Mr. Cole."

Allison was shaking and fighting back tears. She was beyond relieved that Jethro had shown up when he did as Mr. Cole had seemed crazy focused on taking her child from her. Everything had happened so fast but she felt like it had been forever while Mr. Cole was threatening her.

Jethro was about to turn and arrest the man when he heard Ziva yelling at him. He recognized the tone of her voice and so he instinctively pushed Allison and Nathan away and reached for his Sig. The reaction was as natural as breathing for Jethro; something he had done hundreds of times with split second timing and the accuracy that comes only from thousands of practice rounds on the firing range. This time though the split second he took to protect his wife and child was just that much too long.

He turned with his weapon out but Mr. Cole was already squeezing the trigger on his own gun. Jethro fired as well but his shot was thrown off just slightly when Cole's round impacted his chest knocking him backward and down. Cole was hit but the shot had not gone true to its target. However he went down, dead before he hit the sidewalk because Ziva had fired on him as she shouted her warning to Gibbs. She didn't miss and her shot was true to it's mark, striking Cole in the head and killing him almost instantly. Jethro tried to get up but found he couldn't. He couldn't catch his breath and all he could think about was that Nathan shouldn't be seeing this.

Chaos reigned on the sidewalk but Jethro felt like he was in a dream. He tried again to get up but by this time Ziva was there pushing him down and pressing her jacket against his chest to try and contain the bleeding. The whole thing didn't take much more than three minutes from start to finish and now one man was dead, another very possibly dying and a wife, mother and child were terrorized.

"Jethro, look at me. Stay with me."

He heard her voice and tried to focus on her face. A face he hadn't seen in too long. One he still missed sometimes. Why was she yelling at him? Were those tears on her cheeks? Where was Ali? And Nathan?

Allison was in shock but had the presence to mind to keep Nathan turned away from his father lying on the sidewalk. By this time Carlo and some of his staff had come out to see what was happening. He saw Allison and Nathan and went to them immediately. When he saw Jethro on the ground he reached for Nathan and took him from his mother.

"He cannot see this. We will take him. We called 911 already. Do not worry about Nathan, we will care for him."

Allison was grateful for this kindness. She kissed Nathan and told him to go with Carlo and Anna and get some breadsticks.

"What's the matter with daddy?"

"He got hurt but a doctor is coming to fix him. You go on and mommy will see you soon. I love you Nathan."

"I wanna stay with you."

Nathan began crying and Allison was torn between her son and her husband. But right now Nathan had someone to care for him and she absolutely did not want him to see his father bleeding on the sidewalk.

"Nathan, you have to go now. I'll come get you soon. I promise."

Carlo hugged the boy to him and walked away keeping him from seeing his daddy.

Allison knelt beside Jethro opposite Ziva who was still applying pressure to the wound. The two women locked eyes for just a moment and each communicated their worst fears to the other.

"Jethro, just hold on. Help is coming. If you can hear me blink for me."

Jethro blinked at Allison. She grasped his hand and leaned down so he could hear her.

"You hang on babe. I hear the sirens, you're going to be okay. I love you."

"Nathan?"

Jethro could barely breathe and it was all he could do to mumble his son's name.

"He's with Carlo and Anna. He's okay. Jethro, look at me! Stay with me!"

"Love you Ali."

"I love you Jethro."

Jethro tore his eyes from Allison and looked at Ziva.

"Thanks, Zi."

"You are welcome. I think you will be okay. Looks like a small caliber. Just hang on Gibbs."

"Doesn't feel okay. You got him?"

"Yes. I am sorry I was late but there was someone in my line of sight."

"My fault. Should have put him down harder."

Jethro coughed and gasped for breath. Something was wrong; he couldn't breathe. The pain was becoming unbearable and he was afraid he was dying.

He turned to Allison and reached up to pull her closer.

"Love you. Take care of Nate. Tell him I love him."

The ambulance arrived and paramedics began working on Jethro in an instant. Ziva stepped back and looked down at the man she had loved for so long. She could not imagine Jethro dying. They had been in so many tough circumstances over the years; she couldn't fathom it all ending like this, on a sidewalk in the broad daylight with his wife and child there. Allison was standing, watching and holding herself together somehow. Ziva wanted to say something encouraging but she didn't feel all that encouraged herself. She knew though that Jethro loved Allison and his son very much and she understood the best thing she could do for him now was help them as best she could.

"Allison, go with the ambulance and I will get Nathan after I talk to the police. I will call Ducky to meet you at the hospital and I will call Tony to come help with Nathan since the child knows him. We will come to the hospital."

"Ziva, I…..thank you."

"He will be alright. Stay with him."

Allison was allowed to ride in the ambulance with Jethro. Before he closed the door the driver told Ziva they were going to Washington Trauma Center. Ziva thanked him and pulled out her phone to call Ducky and Tony. The police were approaching her but she asked for a moment to call someone for the victim and they agreed.

"Dr. Mallard here."

"Ducky, Ziva here. Gibbs has been shot and is on his way to Washington Trauma Center."

"What? Ziva slow down and tell me what's happened."

"I do not have much time Ducky. Jethro has been shot. You need to meet Allison at the hospital."

"How bad is it?"

"Not sure. He was awake and able to talk but having trouble breathing. Lost a good amount of blood. I need to go Ducky. I will call Tony."

Ziva hung up and called Tony immediately. When he finally answered she was on the verge of tears.

"Hey, Ziva what's going on?"

"Tony, Gibbs has been shot and I need your help."

"Whoa what the hell did you say?"

"Gibbs was shot by a man who was assaulting Allison. Can you come to Luigi's? I am here but Nathan is here with the owners who he knows but he doesn't know me and we need to take him to his mother at the hospital. I have to talk to the police first. Can you come down here, please?"

"Of course. I'm on my way. May take a while from where I am but I imagine you'll be a while anyway. Don't worry Ziva I'm on my way. Hey, is he going to make it?"

"My guess would be yes but you know things happen in the operating room. Please hurry."

Ziva spent the next hour going over what had happened with the Metro police and an investigator from her agency, the Secret Service. She gave a moment by moment account of what she had seen and told them about Allison's call to her the previous week and what she knew about Mr. Cole's call to her colleague earlier that day. Ziva gave the investigating officer her weapon and Jethro's weapon which was still on the ground where he'd fallen. There were several witnesses who had seen the whole incident and who stayed to talk to the officers and give their accounts of what had happened. Tony arrived while Ziva was finishing with the detectives who would be handling the case. They thanked her for her help and after getting her contact information again told her she was free to go.

Once that was done she went to the restaurant, washed up in the ladies room and went to find Nathan. He was sitting in the back with Tony and the woman Ziva presumed was the owner's wife. Nathan was eating breadsticks and having a glass of milk. Ziva watched the boy and was struck by how much he looked like his father. Except for the hair color which was his mother's, Nathan looked very much like Jethro. Ziva took a deep breath and approached the table.

"Hello Nathan. My name is Ziva and I am a friend of your daddy and Tony. Is it alright if I sit with you?"

"Where's my mom?"

Ziva looked over at Tony who shook his head indicating he hadn't told Nathan anything.

"She went to the hospital with your dad. Now that Tony is here and I'm finished talking to the police we are going there too. Would that be okay?"

"Can I see my daddy?"

"Yes, in a while. I think the doctors are going to be helping your daddy get better so we might have to wait a while. Are those pretty good breadsticks?"

"Yes. You want one?"

"Thank you. I need to talk to Tony for a minute and then we will go okay?"

"Okay."

Ziva and Tony stepped away from the table so Nathan would not overhear their conversation.

"Ziva are you okay?"

"Yes. I should have been quicker but there was someone in my sight line. If I had shot sooner Gibbs would not be in the hospital right now."

"Don't second guess yourself. You got the guy. I called Ducky but he didn't have any news. Boss is in surgery. I called to have his car picked up so a couple of agents are on the way. Tim and Abby will meet us at the hospital and Tim called the director so we're all set."

"Tony do you know Nathan very well?"

"I guess. Boss doesn't bring him around the office. I've been to the house a few times but not a lot. I mean he knows who I am and all that."

"Well, we should get to the hospital maybe Allison has someone she wants to come care for him. Or take him home perhaps."

The two of them collected Nathan and headed for the car. Tony realized they needed a car seat for the little boy.

"Let's check Allison's car and see if she happened to leave it unlocked."

Surprisingly she had left the car unlocked so Tony got the car seat out and put it in his car. Ziva helped Nathan get buckled in and gave him a small smile.

"Everything is going to be alright Nathan. We are going to go see your mom and I bet she will be really happy to see you."

"And my daddy?"

"Yes, I hope we see your daddy too."

"Ride with me Ziva and I'll bring you back to your car."

"Are you sure? I could meet you there."

"No ride with me. I don't mind bringing you back. Come on, we need to get going."

The ride to the hospital was quiet as neither Ziva or Tony knew what to say to Nathan and they didn't really want to talk about what had happened in front of him. The little boy looked like he was about to cry. When they arrived, Ziva got Nathan out of the car and he clung to her for dear life. He had seen what happened to his daddy and he was scared. He didn't know who this lady was but she was nice to him and he needed a friend. He looked at her with his father's eyes and raised his hands silently asking to be picked up.

"Hold me please."

Ziva crouched down to Nathan's level and wrapped him in her arms. He wrapped his arms around her neck and buried his face in her hair. She smelled good and her hair was soft. Nathan began to cry and Ziva rubbed his back and tried her best to comfort him. She began to suspect he might have seen more than they realized.

"Nathan are you scared of something?"

"The man was trying to take me and daddy got mad. The man had a gun and daddy fell down. It was loud and mommy was crying. I want my daddy."

"The man who was trying to take you is gone now Nathan. He cannot hurt you or mommy or daddy. Yes, daddy fell down but he's inside the hospital with the doctors and they are fixing him. Your mom is waiting for you. Tony and I will not let anything happen to you okay?"

"Okay."

Ziva started to put him down but Nathan held on to her like a lifeline so she carried him into the hospital. His face was still buried in her hair but he had stopped crying. His little body seemed to melt into hers and Ziva held him tightly trying to impart some sense of safety to him. When they stepped off the elevator on the surgical floor they saw Ducky pacing in the hallway.

"Hey, Ducky any news?"

Ducky turned at the sound of Tony's voice and saw Ziva holding Jethro's son. For a moment he flashed back to the time before Ziva left. To the time when he was sure she and Jethro were falling in love with each other. He pulled his thoughts back to the present and shook his head.

"Not yet. Allison is in the waiting room just down the hall."

Ziva moved in that direction. When she stopped in the doorway Allison looked up and saw her son wrapped around the woman her husband had given up to be with them. Ziva turned so Nathan could see his mom.

"Look who I found Nathan."

The little boy lifted his head and gave a weak smile.

"Mommy."

Allison stood and took Nathan in her arms. She hugged him and kissed his head over and over. Looking over his shoulder at Ziva she said, "Thank you for taking care of Nathan and bringing him to me. And for saving Jethro."

"You are welcome. I wish I had been quicker. Is there someone we could call for you? Someone to care for Nathan while you wait?"

"I've called Jethro's father already. There isn't anyone else."

"Do you have a nanny or regular sitter that could take Nathan home soon?"

"I want to stay with you mommy."

"I know baby. You can stay for a while. Can you sit down here for just a minute while I talk to Ducky and Tony and Ziva?"

"Don't go mommy."

"I'll be right there in the doorway. You can still see me, okay? I won't leave you I promise."

"Okay."

Nathan snuggled down in the chair keeping his eyes on the doorway.

Ducky and Tony approached and Ziva asked if they had any update. Allison kept her eyes on Nathan while she listened to Ducky.

"The nurse went to get an update for us and will be back in a moment. Allison is there someone to care for Nathan tonight? I know you will want to stay with Jethro."

"I can call Mrs. Green. She stays with Nathan at home during the day and I'm sure she would stay with him tonight. As soon as I know something I'll call her."

The nurse approached and they all turned their attention to her.

"Dr. Simons asked me to let you know they are almost finished. Mrs. Gibbs, your husband has had a difficult time during the surgery but they are confident he is stable at the moment."

"What does that mean exactly?"

"He has coded twice on the table but they were able to revive him. He lost a lot of blood but as I said, he's stable at the moment. Dr. Simons will be out as soon as he can to give you the details."

Ducky spoke up and thanked the nurse for talking to them. Ziva pulled Allison aside and told her what Nathan had said at the car.

"I believe Nathan saw more than you would have liked. He was very afraid when he talked about the bad man. He did see Jethro on the ground. He did not mention seeing blood so maybe he did not see that. I told him the bad man was gone and could not hurt any of you. That seemed to satisfy him at the time but he has asked several times about seeing his father."

Allison's mind was reeling with all that had happened in the last few hours. She had gone from anticipating a quiet dinner with the two people she loved most in the world to praying for one of them to still be alive in an hour. Now her precious child was terrified by a horrible man and by seeing his father shot before his eyes. Not exactly the evening she had planned when she left the house.

"I have no words to thank you Ziva. If you had not yelled at Jethro and then shot Mr. Cole I shudder to think what might have happened."

"There is no need to thank me. I only wish I had been there a few seconds sooner. Jethro has saved me, all of us really, many times so it is only right I could return the favor. I am praying for him now."

"Thank you for taking care of Nathan."

"It was my pleasure. He is a very sweet little boy."

"Will you come sit with us? Nathan seems to have formed an attachment to you and I want him to have all the security he can get tonight."

"Of course."

Ziva and Allison went back to sit down and Nathan crawled into his mother's lap. Soon he was fast asleep so Allison took the opportunity to speak with Ziva.

"Ziva, I am wondering why you were at the restaurant tonight. Not just our lucky day I imagine."

"No, I had tried to call you earlier but you had just left your office so I called Jethro. I had spoken to a co-worker about Mr. Cole after you called me and today he called me back. He said Cole had called him and seemed very depressed. He said Cole told him good bye in a way that seemed very final so he alerted me to his concerns. I called Jethro to warn him, and you, and he suggested I meet you for dinner to tell you what I knew about Cole."

"Well, I'm awfully glad he did and that you came."

Allison pulled her phone out of her purse and called Mrs. Green to see if she could stay with Nathan overnight. She didn't answer and Allison tried to think if she had said she was going out tonight. Then she saw she had a missed call and a message. It was Mrs. Green telling her she might be a bit late the next morning as she was staying the night with a friend who was ill. Allison sighed and put the phone down. Now she didn't know what to do with Nathan. Mrs. Green was really the only person except for Abby who had stayed with Nathan since he was a baby. She knew Abby would want to be at the hospital with the rest of Jethro's team.

Ziva saw the distressed look on Allison's face and wondered what the message had been.

"Is everything alright?"

"Our nanny is not available tonight. I don't have anyone who can stay with Nathan and I hate to have him here all night."

Allison who had been so strong the whole evening was on the verge of crying. She was tired and very afraid and didn't want her little boy to see all that. She knew she would not leave the hospital tonight but what to do with Nathan?

Ziva argued with herself but finally made a decision based on her love for Jethro and what she knew he would want her to do. She wanted to stay at the hospital and make sure he was alright but she knew that wasn't what he would ask her to do if he could. Allison would stay with him and so would Ducky and the rest of his team. That was how it should be and she was no longer a part of the team. She could do something just as important. Or maybe even more important.

"I could take Nathan home and stay with him until your nannay arrives tomorrow. If you think he would be alright with that. Or, I could take him to my place and he could stay with me. I would bring him back to you tomorrow or take him home whichever you thought was best."

"Are you sure Ziva? You barely know Nathan. I hate to put that on you."

"I am sure. You are right I barely know your son but I know you and his father and I want to help. I cannot help Jethro here and he has you here as it should be of course. If I can help by taking Nathan home I am glad to do it. I am not sure he will leave though without seeing his father."

"Thank you Ziva. I agree he will have a fit if he can't at least see his dad. Let me talk to Ducky and see what he says."

"I will get him for you."

Ziva walked over to Ducky in the hallway and told him Allison needed to talk to him. Then she joined Tony, Tim and Abby in milling around the hallway. They were all tired of sitting and yet did not want to leave in case the doctor showed up. Ducky went to sit with Allison.

"What can I do for you my dear?"

"Ducky, Nathan needs to be at home tonight but I'm afraid he will be very upset and worried if he doesn't get to at least see Jethro. What do you think?"

"I think that may depend on how Jethro looks when they get him into ICU. I'm afraid he will tethered to a number of machines and tubes and the ICU itself is a pretty scary place. It may do him more harm than good. You know him best what do you think?"

Allison was fried by this time. Her nerves were shot and she was on the verge of tears again. She really wanted someone to take charge and tell her what to do but she knew that wasn't going to happen. As much as she loved Jethro she knew the people here with her loved him too. And they had all known him for much longer than she had. They were on good terms of course but she was still at least partly an outsider in this group. Ducky watched Allison try to process all that was happening and felt very badly for her. Of course he knew the history between her and Jethro and it had taken a while for him to warm to the idea of them together. Now however he knew his friend was happy and content with his life and of course adored his son. Ducky decided to step in and give Allison some advice.

"My dear I suggest you send Nathan home and not let him see Jethro until he is stable and not connected to as many devices as I expect him to be tonight. In my opinion seeing his father tonight would be a bad idea. If I thought Jethro was not going to survive I would advise differently but I believe you have time to let Nathan wait and see him in a better light so to speak. Of course it is your decision but that is my advice to you."

Allison was relieved to have Ducky tell her what he thought. She felt the same way but having Jethro's oldest and most trusted friend validate that opinion was very helpful.

"Thank you Ducky. I agree. Ziva has offered to take Nathan home with her and either bring him here or take him home in the morning. I am inclined to let her do that. What do you think?"

Ducky was surprised by this but only for a moment. Then he realized that Ziva was offering to care for the person most important to Jethro and by extension to support the woman he loved. How Jethro managed to have two so very different women in love with him was a mystery Ducky would never understand.

"I think Ziva would be a good person to care for Nathan. He seemed to be comfortable with her earlier and she is good with little ones. She will take good care of him you can be sure of that."

Allison looked out into the hallway at Ziva so at ease with the rest of the team. She knew why Ziva was no longer part of that team and she suddenly felt guilty about that.

"I know she loves Jethro or at least she did at one time. And I think maybe he loved her. This is certainly a strange situation, Ducky."

"A bit unusual but not in any bad way I don't think. Jethro is very happy with you Allison. He loves you very much and is happier than I have ever known him to be. Whatever was between him and Ziva is long over. She would never do anything to disrespect Jethro or you. Of that I am very sure."

"No, I know that. I don't worry about that at all, Ducky. Oh, I'm just so frazzled I don't know what I'm feeling or doing. Where is that doctor with some news?"

Ziva walked back over to the couch where Allison was sitting still holding the sleeping Nathan.

"I would like to stay and hear what the doctor has to say and then, if you want me to, I will take Nathan home. Tony will lend me his car with the car seat and we will trade later. By the way, we took the car seat out of your car and locked your car. Two agents came from NCIS and took Gibbs' car back to the Navy Yard."

"Thank you Ziva. Yes I would like you to take Nathan home with you if you're sure it's no trouble. Of course, don't go until we all hear how Jethro is doing. Hopefully that will be soon."

In about five minutes the surgeon finally arrived in the waiting area. He walked over to Allison and pulled a chair up to sit in front of her. He spoke quietly so as not to awaken the child in her arms.

"Mrs. Gibbs your husband is in recovery. He had a difficult time during the surgery but he is stable now and I don't expect any problems. The next few hours are critical of course but he's in good condition generally speaking so I expect he'll do fine. He lost a lot of blood before we got him on the table and the bullet caused a pretty significant amount of damage on its way through your husband's chest and out. As I said he is stable now and will be moved to the ICU once he's out of the recovery room. Should be in about thirty minutes or so. At that time someone will come get you so you can see him."

"Thank you doctor. So you think he's going to be okay?"

"Eventually, yes. The next couple of days we'll keep him pretty sedated so he can rest without pain. He won't be awake much but at this point he needs time to heal more than anything."

"Thank you again, doctor."

"Get some rest Mrs. Gibbs. Your husband is doing well."

After the doctor left everyone gave a collective sigh of relief. It seemed Gibbs would cheat death once again. He hadn't had a serious injury since he and Allison got together but Ducky and the team had been in similar waiting rooms several times before. This was maybe the worst so far and they were all very happy to know the Boss was going to be okay.

Ziva stood and took Nathan from his mother. The little boy barely stirred before laying his head on Ziva's shoulder and going right back to dreamland. Allison kissed Nathan on the cheek and ran her fingers through his hair.

"I'll walk down with you and get a breath of air."

"Good idea."

In the elevator Allison leaned on the wall and closed her eyes.

"He will be okay," Ziva told her quietly.

"I know. I've just never been through this before. I've always feared this happening but certainly not like tonight. Not because of _my_ job."

"This is not your fault, Allison. Jethro was protecting you and Nathan from a crazy man. You could not have predicted this or prevented it for that matter."

"I know. Look Ziva I know this is something of an awkward situation and I truly do appreciate you taking care of Nathan. I know you and Jethro were very close and I …"

"Yes, we were close. I care about Jethro and for me that means I care about the people he loves. I am very glad that you and Jethro are happy together and that you have this precious child. I wanted to hate you but how could I when all you did was have the good sense to fall in love with Jethro? Do not worry about Nathan tonight. I will take good care of him and I will tell him his daddy is getting better and he can see him tomorrow."

They two women arrived at the parking lot and still Nathan was asleep. Allison realized she had nothing of Nathan's to give Ziva. She had left his bag of extra clothes and treats and toys in her car. Allison expertly put her sleeping son in the car seat and buckled him in.

"I don't have any of his things to give you."

"Tony grabbed his bag from your car so I think we will be fine. Go on back and see Jethro. Here is my card with all my numbers. Just call me tomorrow and let me know what to do with Nathan."

Allison gave Ziva a quick hug then headed back to wait for Jethro to wake up. She could not get over the irony of the woman she almost lost Jethro to driving away with her son.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

**Three Little Words**

**Chapter 11**

When Allison got back to the waiting area everyone was sitting around half asleep. She looked at these people who meant so much to her husband and vowed to know them better in the future. She had not intentionally distanced herself from Jethro's team it was just that they had always kept their private lives very separate from their work lives. At least until tonight. Tonight those two lives had definitely collided with disastrous results. Before she sat down a nurse came down the hall to get her.

"Mrs. Gibbs, I'm Henry, one of your husband's nurses. Your husband is settled in the ICU so if you come with me you can see him."

"I'd like my husband's doctor to join me if that's alright."

"Of course. We can't let everyone in at once but once you've seen him if you want the others to have a few moments we can do that one at a time. He's not awake right now but I expect he will be soon. I suggest everyone move to the waiting room on the fifth floor."

Ducky joined Allison and they set off for the ICU. The team and Abby headed for the waiting area on the fifth floor. Allison wanted Ducky with her because she knew she could trust him to be very honest with her and because she knew he loved Jethro like a son and needed to see him to assure himself Jethro was alright or at least on the way to being alright. She steeled herself for what she was about to see. Ducky must have sensed her anxiety building because he reached for her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"Remember it usually looks very scary and intimidating but everything has its purpose and it is all to help Jethro. Don't be frightened by how he looks."

"I'll try. This is all new to me Ducky."

"I know. I'll be right here."

In the courtroom Allison was a tenacious, fearless advocate for her clients and a formidable opponent to the opposing counsel. She knew the law and how it worked and how to make it work for her clients. She never shied away from a confrontation in the courtroom and she feared no one when it came to waging battle in court. This though, this was very different. She had rarely been in a hospital and certainly not in an ICU. She knew little about surgery or recovering or all the machines and tubes and electronics used in modern medicine. All she knew about all that was what she saw on television or the movies. So, basically she was in foreign territory tonight.

When Allison and Ducky stepped into the cubicle where Jethro was being cared for she stopped in her tracks and looked around at all the contraptions connected to her husband. She looked like anything but a confident, kick-ass attorney. But then again that is not what she was tonight. Tonight, in this cold room she was a scared wife whose husband was lying very still in a hospital bed. Once she had taken in the situation, Allison moved to the side of the bed and reached for Jethro's hand. Henry came over and put the side rail down for her and she leaned over and kissed Jethro on the forehead. She ran her fingers through his hair and kissed him again. The tears she had held onto for so long finally could not be contained and the spilled onto the pillow beside Jethro's head.

Allison whispered in his ear, "I love you. You are going to be okay, Jethro. I'm here and I love you so much. Nathan is fine and we love you."

Ducky had been in conference with Henry and he brought a chair over for Allison. She sat down but never took her eyes off Jethro nor did she let go of his hand.

"He's doing well, Allison. All his vital signs are strong and he's resting comfortably which is exactly what we want him to do."

Allison wiped her tears away and took a deep breath.

"I've never seen him so still. You know Jethro; he usually can't be still for a minute. Not unless he's reading to Nathan or sleeping that is. We should let the team come in and see him and then I hope they'll go get some sleep."

"Yes, I'll go get them. I don't know if they'll leave though."

One by one the team came in to get a look at the Boss and satisfiy themselves that he was doing okay. Abby was first followed by Tim and finally Tony. Getting used to his mentor and boss being married to Allison had been particularly difficult for Tony. He had been with Jethro the longest except for Ducky and he had disliked Ms. Hart intensely when she first showed up at NCIS. He also had a pretty strong suspicion of what was going on between the Boss and Ziva way back when and it hurt him that she had left the team. But, he had to concede that Gibbs was happy and that made it possible for Tony to finally accept Allison.

"The Boss is tough. He'll be okay before you know it. I don't know if Ducky has warned you but when Bossman wakes up he'll be kinda grouchy. He hates hospitals and he'll want to go home way before the docs will think it's okay. He's not what you'd call a good patient. There are nurses at Bethesda who run when he comes in there. Just so you know."

Allison smiled for the first time in many hours. She liked Tony and she knew Jethro loved him and trusted him with his life.

"Thanks for the warning. I'll try and be ready but I'm guessing it could get ugly for a while. I hope I can count on your help."

"Of course. Anything you need you just let me know. Seriously, I mean that Allison. I was thinking I might go over and hang out with Ziva and Nathan tonight. You know just in case Nathan woke up scared or something maybe since he knows me a little I could help."

"I'd appreciate that, Tony."

"Listen, you call if you need anything or if anything goes sideways. Here's my card."

"Thank you Tony. I'll call in the morning and let you guys know where to take Nathan. I hope he can come see his dad sometime tomorrow."

"Yeah, that would be good for both of them if the Boss is up to it. Night, Allison."

Ducky put his hand on her shoulder. "I'm going to step out for a while and let you and Jethro be alone. He'll hear you if you talk to him."

"Thanks Ducky."

Allison squeezed Jethro's hand and stood up so she could see him better. She kissed him again and rested her forehead gently on his. She was scared to her bones but she knew somehow that Jethro would be alright. He wouldn't leave her she was certain of that. She hated that he had to go through all this because of that crazy man who was trying to hurt her. Mr. Cole had definitely succeeded in hurting her but thankfully she would never have to worry about him again. One more kiss and then Allison sat back down and began talking to her husband.

"Hey, I know you're in there and you probably don't want to wake up but I'd sure like to see those baby blues. I love you Jethro and if you could just wake up for a few minutes I'd be so happy. Tonight sure didn't turn out the way I had hoped. I'm still craving Anna's lasagne so as soon as you're up to it we're going to Luigi's for dinner and this time we're going to make it inside.

I was so scared Jethro when that horrible man showed up but as soon as I saw you I knew we were safe. I'm so sorry this happened to you; I would give anything to take away the pain you're in. Please try to wake up and look at me Jethro. I love you so much. All your team was here and they came in to make sure you are really doing okay. You are doing good you know. I just want you to wake up and hear me tell you I love you."

Jethro would indeed hear Allison talking and could feel her holding his hand and running her fingers up and down his arm. It felt good to have her touch him and the sound of her voice was soothing him. She was right he didn't really want to wake up just yet. Somehow he knew in his subconscious that when he woke up he was going to hurt. This wasn't the first time he'd been seriously injured and somewhere deep in his mind he remembered the pain associated with the first few days of recovery.

Getting blown up in Kuwait, shot in Colombia and all the other assorted minor and major incidents were still in his memory banks and none of them were good memories. On the other hand he really did want to see Allison and hear her more clearly and he would like to be able to reach up and touch her face. And of course he wanted to see Nathan. As much as he loved his wife, Nathan was the light of his life. Yes, he wanted to wake up and see the people he loved and get his life back.

Allison felt a slight movement in her hand and when she squeezed his hand lightly, Jethro squeezed back. She stood up and leaned down closer to his face and spoke softly.

"I felt that. I know you're in there babe. Come on and wake up for me. Please Jethro let me see those blue eyes."

Jethro willed himself awake enough to open his eyes and look at her for a moment. He had to concentrate to stay awake but after blinking a few times he managed to really open his eyes and give Allison a very faint smile.

Henry, who had been hovering nearby gave Allison a thumbs up as he stepped closer to check all the monitors.

"Oh god Jethro I'm so glad to see you. Don't try to talk. You're going to be fine but you do need to rest."

Jethro pulled his hand free and reached up to touch Allison's cheek. He blinked slowly and she understood.

"I know and I love you too."

Henry stepped to the side of the bed and Allison stood up so he could talk to Jethro.

"Agent Gibbs you're doing great. You will be sleepy for a while but just let that happen. You need lots of rest for a day or so."

Jethro stayed awake for about fifteen minutes that time and then he was gone again for a couple of hours. Throughout the night Allison kept watch along with Henry. Jethro woke up briefly every two or three hours which Henry said was what they expected. He was on pretty heavy pain medication so they didn't expect him to be fully awake and alert just yet. Allison slept on and off but she didn't want to miss any of Jethro's awake times so she stayed in the chair which wasn't conducive to sleep. Henry assured her their patient was doing well.

By mid-morning the day after the shooting Jethro was finally beginning to really be awake and aware of his surroundings. Allison had left the room for a while earlier in the morning to call Jack and tell him what was going on. He asked if he should come and Allison suggested he wait until Jethro went home so he could help corral the patient. Allison had been told by Ducky that Jethro was indeed not a good patient and would be difficult to live with for a few days before he got to go home and then for several more as he adjusted to his limits while recovering.

Jack agreed to wait and come on the condition that Allison call him daily which she was happy to promise. Allison also called Ziva to check on Nathan.

"How did he do last night?"

"He was fine. He barely woke up when I took him in the house. I let him sleep on my bed and he slept until seven o'clock. Tony stayed the night as well. We have had breakfast and I promised to let him talk to you when you called. He has been asking about his daddy but so far Tony and I have kept him entertained. He is a very good little boy."

"Yes, he is a good boy. Jethro is doing well or so they tell me. He is beginning to be more awake more often. I have consulted with the nurses and they suggest that by about noon he will be able to at least acknowledge Nathan's presence. Could you bring him up here just after lunch?"

"Of course. Here let me get him to talk to you."

"Hi mommy. Can I see daddy?"

"Yes, Ziva will bring you to see him after lunch okay? Are you being a good boy?"

"I being good. We had O's and nannas for bekfast."

"Good boy. I'll see you after lunch. I love you Nathan."

"Love you mommy. Bye."

Nathan gave the phone back to Ziva and ran back to the living room where Tony was reading him a story.

"Thank you so much Ziva. You have been a lifesaver in more ways than one."

"I am glad I could help with Nathan. The other thing goes without saying. Tony and I will see you at the hospital unless he gets a case."

Tony did get called into work so Ziva took Nathan to the hospital by herself. She really liked this little boy; he was sweet but very much a boy. He had a good time roughhousing with Tony and he could make all kinds of truck noises that Ziva was sure little boys did naturally. He was definitely Jethro's son; he had the stare already well rehearsed but he was good natured and well mannered. It was a battle for Ziva to not think, 'what it'.

In the last three years she had accepted Jethro's choice and she was happy with her life but she had not found a man she cared about. She had dated a few but they all fell short when she compared them to Jethro. She knew that was unfair and she needed to stop but that was hard to do. Ziva definitely had high standards when it came to men. She had to admit though that she had enjoyed having Tony at the apartment last night. She and Tony had not seem much of each other in the last couple of years and Ziva was remembering how funny he could be but also very serious at the appropriate time. He was understandably upset by Jethro's shooting and they had spent a lot of time last night talking about old times. Ziva thougth about that on the way to the hospital and decided she would take Tony up on the suggestion they get together soon.

As it turned out, by eleven o'clock Jethro was awake and alert and already beginning to be grouchy. Allison couldn't blame him and it hurt her to see him so uncomfortable and obviously in pain. He indicated very clearly that he wanted the breathing tube out and his nurse left to get a doctor to check him.

"Jethro please calm down and try to relax. You have needed that to help you breath and as soon as possible I'm sure they will remove it."

Jethro squeezed her hand and blinked twice at her to signal he understood. Allison had never been hurt, never been in a hospital so she could only imagine what Jethro was going through. She wanted to help but of course all she could do was hold his hand and try to say the right things. She felt very inadequate in this role. It wasn't hard for her to be supportive and loving but it was hard for her to be calm. All this was still scary for her and she hated herself for feeling so pitiful.

"Hey, Nathan will be up here pretty soon. I know that will make you feel better."

Jethro nodded and blinked at her. Allison leaned down and kissed him on the forehead and Jethro managed to get his hand in her hair to hold her there. It felt so good to have her touching him. He knew she must be scared to death and he wished he could tell her how much she was helping him. That was one reason he wanted the damned tube out of his throat. Plus, he knew it would scare Nathan and if he was coming up soon it definitely had to come out. He wondered where Nathan was and who was taking care of him. Mrs. Green probably.

A doctor finally showed up and after checking Jethro's chart and all the various machines he was connected to he asked Jethro if he wanted the tube out. Jethro nodded. The doctor told him to cough and warned it would be uncomfortable. Jethro was well aware of that fact. This was not his first time with a breathing tube. He gave Allison's hand a quick squeeze to reassure her and coughed. The discomfort of having a rather large tube pulled out of your throat was well worth it to be able to talk. At least whisper for the moment at least. The nurse gave him a couple of ice cubes which Jethro gratefully enjoyed. Then she wiped his mouth and chin with a warm cloth and cleaned off the tape residue. Jethro was breathing easily with just the nasal canula and he was beginning to feel at least a fraction better.

Jethro turned his attention back to Allison and croaked out, "Hi beautiful."

"Hi yourself. I love you."

"Love you. Nathan?"

"He's fine. He was a little bit scared and he's been begging to see you so Ziva is bringing him up about one o'clock."

Jethro thought he had misunderstood. Ziva? Ziva was bringing his son to see him? And Allison was okay with that? What the hell had happened while he was out?

Allison almost laughed at the myriad of emotions and questions she saw pass through Jethro's eyes.

"Yes, Ziva. She was kind enough to take Nathan home with her after you got out of surgery. She knew I wouldn't leave and neither would your team until they saw you and knew you were going to be okay. Mrs. Green was not available so she offered. Nathan likes her so I let him go with her. He's fine, Jethro. And yes, I'm fine with it."

Jethro just smiled at her and she saw him relax. He turned to the nurse and asked for one of the mouth swabs. She handed him two and winked at him then left the room pulling the curtain closed. Jethro ran the minty swabs around in his mouth doing his best to improve a situation that really called for a toothbrush and mouthwash. He couldn't wait that long. When he was finished he tossed them on the table and turned his attention back to his wife.

"Not exactly a good brushing but could I have a kiss anyway?"

His voice was still scratchy and weak but Allison certainly got the message.

"Yes, you certainly may."

She leaned down and framed his face with both hands before kissing him gently on the mouth. That turned into several more soft, clingy kisses before Jethro persuaded her to get serious. They got as serious as they could under the circumstances and Jethro's recovery took several steps forward. When they needed to come up for air, Allison rested her head near his and whispered to him how much she loved him.

"I'm sorry you have to go through this Ali."

"Me? You're the one in the ICU. I'm sorry you got caught up in my crazy case."

"I should have dealt with him first but I had to make sure you and Nate were okay. I know this is scary for you. I've been through this before and you haven't. It'll all be okay, Ali. I promise."

"I know. I was scared but I'm okay now. I just want you to get better and come home to us."

"I'll be out of here in no time. Don't worry about that."

"Ducky and Tony said you're not a very good patient. They warned me you'd be trouble."

"I bet they did. I'll do exactly what I'm told this time because I have two people waiting on me. I promise I'll be a perfect patient this time. Have you talked to my dad?"

"Yes, I called him right away. He's going to come down when you go home. I thought that would be nicer for him and for you, than having him sit around a hospital room. Okay?"

"Perfect. I think I could handle another kiss."

"Your wish is my command. But don't get used to that!"

After another round of kissing, Allison sat down and held onto Jethro's hand. She took in the room and all the machinery and hoped Nathan wouldn't be frightened by what he saw. Jethro had an IV in the back of his hand, a chest tube draining into a bag hanging on the bed and a catheter. His color was pretty good and he didn't look all that bad unless you knew how good he usually looked. It was strange to see her normally vigorous husband laid up in a hospital bed almost completely dependent on other people. She knew how he must hate being in that position. She wouldn't blame him for being a cranky patient.

Sensing what she was worrying about Jethro pulled on her hand to get her attention.

"Worried about Nate being scared?"

"Yes, a little. I think he really needs to see you but I am concerned about all this." She waved her hand around the room and him.

"Just keep him on that side of the bed where he can't see the drains. He'll be okay."

"Good idea. Why don't you rest so you'll have some energy when he gets here. I don't want to wear you out."

"I hate to go back to sleep."

"I know. I'm right here and I'll make sure to wake you before they get here."

"Have you been home or even out of this room?"

"No. I'll go home later when you're better. Don't worry about me, Jethro. I'm exactly where I want to be."

"Good 'cos I don't want you to leave here just yet."

"I won't. Now just relax so you can enjoy Nathan when he gets here."

Jethro dozed on and off and Allison finally gave in and laid her head down on the bed next to Jethro's chest. He managed to get his fingers tangled in her hair and they slept like that for about twenty minutes before Allison's aching back woke her up. Jethro was awake staring at the ceiling. When he felt her moving he looked over at her and smiled. This was the first time he'd been in the hospital when he actually had someone to go home with. Always before he had gone home alone and made the best of it. He had Ducky and his team of course but he was always reluctant to accept their help. Now he had a wife and a son who would be there waiting. He felt very lucky and very anxious to get stong enough to go home. Right now though he just hoped he could summon the strength to give Nathan a good visit and not scare him.

"I'm going to the ladies room and freshen up a bit. I'll be back in a few mintues."

"Take your time. Go for a walk and get some fresh air. I'll be right here when you get back. You need to take care of yourself, Ali. This will take a while."

"I will. I'll be back in a few."

After Allison threw some water on her face and brushed hair she felt better. Looking in the mirror she thought she might scare Nathan more than his father would; she looked a bit worse for the wear. She took Jethro's advice and walked outside the hospital and around the building soaking up the sun and fresh air. It felt so good to be out of that cold, antiseptic ICU. Looking around at the world going on all around her it was hard to believe her own little world was so upside down at the moment. She knew they were lucky Jethro had survived and she thanked God they were going to have more time together.

As she started back in the hospital she spotted Ziva and Nathan walking hand-in-hand toward her. She stopped and watched them. Nathan was smiling and swinging his hand in Ziva's. They looked good together and Allison felt a tiny twinge of . . . something she couldn't quite identify. She pushed that something out of her mind. She and Jethro were happy together, they loved each other and she had no reason to worry about Ziva. She refused to let that thought take hold of her. Ziva was a friend now and someone she would trust just as she did her husband. And Nathan liked her.

"Mommy!"

"Hey, how's my little man?"

"I'm good. Can we go see daddy?"

"Of course. Hello Ziva. Thank you so much for helping us."

"It has been my pleasure. Except for the circumstances of course. How is Jethro?"

"He's doing better. Got the breathing tube out which helped a lot. He's still weak of course but very excited to see you Nathan."

"Let's go."

Nathan was pulling his mother's hand and since he still had hold of Ziva's hand he pulled her along too.

"I should go and leave you to your visit."

"Oh no, Ziva, come in and see Jethro. He'll want to see you I'm sure. Unless, are we keeping you from work?"

"No I am on routine leave because of the shooting so I am free."

"Oh dear. Will this be a problem for you?"

"No, not at all. It is just routine, nothing to worry about."

They arrived at the elevators and Nathan pushed the up button. When they got inside he asked what number to push. Allison told him five and he pushed the button.

Allison was nervous about Nathan seeing his dad so when they arrived on the fifth floor she took him to the waiting area and sat him on her lap. Ziva stood in the doorway sort of guarding the area so they could have some privacy.

"Nathan do you remember when we were going to Luigi's and daddy got hurt?"

"The bad man hurt daddy and he fell down."

"Yes, that's right and now daddy is getting better but he is still hurt so I don't want you to be scared. Daddy can't play with you or get up yet so we have to careful with him. Okay?"

"Okay, mommy. Can I kiss him?"

"Yes, you sure can and I bet he'll really like that. Now, you stay here with Ziva for just a minute and I'll go make sure daddy is awake. I'll be right back."

Hearing that, Ziva went into the room and sat down on the couch near Allison and Nathan. When Allison got up and put Nathan down he automatically climbed onto Ziva's lap.

"Tell daddy to wake up."

"Okay, I'll go do that right now. I'll be back in a minute."

When Allison got to the ICU, Jethro was awake and the nurse had put an extra blanket on the side of the bed that draped down over the drain bag and catheter bag. Jethro's head was slightly elevated so he could see better. Just seeing him not lying flat on his back was an improvement.

"I have a little boy outside who is very anxious to see you. Are you ready?"

"Yep. Bring him in."

Allison went to get Nathan and Ziva.

"You two go ahead and I will wait out here for a few mintues."

"Okay but please don't leave. Jethro wants to see you."

"I will not leave."

Allison carried Nathan into the room so she could better control what he saw and so he could see his daddy better. Nathan was anything but patient and squirmed in her arms.

"Daddy!"

Jethro was fighting the effects of the pain medication, trying to stay alert enough to visit with his son.

"Hey, little man. I'm glad to see you."

"I miss you daddy. I went with Ziva and Tony. Ziva said the bad man is gone. Is the bad man gone daddy?"

Allison sat Nathan gently on the edge of the bed keeping hold of him lest he crawl all over his daddy. Jethro reached up and ran his hand over Nathan's head.

"Yes, the bad man is gone. He won't hurt you or mommy. Did you have fun with Ziva and Tony?"

"Yes, Tony read me a story and Ziva put me to bed. She's nice. When you come home daddy?"

"In a few days. And guess who's coming to visit. Grandpa Jack."

"Yeah. Can mommy come home now?"

"I think mommy will come home tonight. Mrs. Green is coming to stay with you, okay?"

"Okay. The bad man made you fall down daddy."

"Yeah he did but I'm okay. I mean I'll be okay in a few days. I have to stay here and get better then I'll be home. I need you to help mommy and Mrs. Green at home."

"Then we get a puppy?"

Jethro laughed in spite of the fact that it hurt a lot to do so.

"We'll talk about it. Can you give me a kiss now because I have to go to sleep."

Jethro was fading fast and this short visit had taxed what little energy he had. Allison helped Nathan lean over carefully and kiss his daddy on the cheek.

"You scratchy daddy."

"I know. I love you Nathan."

"Love you daddy."

"Come on let's get down so daddy can take a nap. I think Mrs. Green is probably waiting for you downstairs. Tell daddy goodbye and I'll take you down so you can go home and play."

"Bye daddy. See you."

"By Nate. Be a good boy. I love you."

"I'll be back in a few minutes. Ziva's here. Are you up to a few more minutes?"

"Yeah. Tell her to come in."

Allison took Nathan into the hall.

"He won't be awake much longer but he wants you to go in. I'm taking Nathan down to meet Mrs. Green so he can go home. Thank you again, Ziva."

"You are very welcome. I will not stay long. I do not want to tire Jethro out."

"Don't worry, he'll be asleep before long anyway."

Ziva gave Nathan a hug goodbye then stepped into Jethro's room. He looked a bit better than she expected but he was obviously about asleep. She stepped to the side of the bed and reached for his hand. As she grasped his hand Jethro opened his eyes and smiled at her.

"Hey, Ziver."

"Hello. I will not ask how you are feeling since I know you would lie anyway. Allison tells me you are doing well. I am glad to hear it."

"Thanks to you that I'm even here."

"Well, if I had been faster you would be at home in perfect condition instead of here recovering."

"Nonsense. If you hadn't yelled at me Cole would have shot me in the back and I'd be dead. I owe you my life, Ziva. Thank you for being there…..again."

"You are welcome."

"And thanks for helping with Nate. I appreciate that more than I can say."

"I know. He is a sweet little boy. You are doing a great job with him of course."

"Ziva….." There were things Jethro wanted to say but he wasn't sure how or if he should.

"I am glad you are happy, Jethro. You have a good family and you deserve to be happy."

"I kept my promise to you. Have you kept yours?"

"I am still working on it. I am fine, honestly. I enjoy my work and I have friends. There is no one special but I am fine with that. My standards are very high so it will take a while I imagine for me to find someone I can be with."

"Don't use me as a measuring stick. You can do much better."

Ziva still had hold of his hand and she didn't want to let go but she knew she must. She needed to go so he could sleep and so she could breathe. Even after all this time she still loved him. She tried not to but, still, she did.

"Try to be a good patient this time. Take care of yourself, Jethro."

"Ziver, don't be a stranger."

"Not a stranger but not a frequent visitor either, Jethro. I cannot do that."

Ziva leaned down and kissed him on the cheek. "Get better soon. I love you."

Then she turned and was gone.

Jethro lay there for long moments not moving. Sleep was about to pull him under but he needed to think for a minute first. He hated that Ziva was still struggling because of him. He knew he had done the right thing; he was where he was supposed to be and he had a family, but there would always be a part of him that belonged to Ziva. He would keep that part buried and protected much like he had kept Shannon and Kelly protected deep in his heart for so long.

Jethro looked out into the nursing area and saw Allison talking to his doctor at the nurse's station. She was a a beautiful woman and she loved him. She was a great mom. He was proud of her and of the work she did. She helped people and she took good care of her family. They had worked hard together to make a family and he didn't want to mess that up. He wouldn't mess it up. Jethro had come to understand the overwhelming love he had for Shannon when he was a young man would never be duplicated. He stopped looking for that years ago. Then Ziva had shown up in his basement that night and he felt that long forgotten spark of electricity in his heart and soul. That was not what he felt for Allison and he had made peace with that. He loved his wife in a different way; not more or less but different. He had found comfort with her and a steadiness he hadn't known he wanted. And he had Nathan. And next year they would try for another child. His life was finally on the right track and Jethro would not give that up for anything on earth. Not even Ziva.

END


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